HELP

Tiffani - posted on 04/08/2015 ( 5 moms have responded )

3

0

1

My son is 5 months old and his dad has been locked up since before I found out I was pregnant, hes not on the birth certificate and is now trying to take my son. What is the likeliness of him getting him. Hes gunna get a lawyer and me being a single mom with my own place and two babies I can't afford one. What should I do?

5 Comments

View replies by

Dove - posted on 04/08/2015

11,689

0

1349

You need to go to court. There is no way around that. You may qualify for Legal Aid or perhaps you have a family member who could pay for a lawyer... or you could try and represent yourself (I don't recommend this, but it has been done). The father has a right to a relationship w/ his child and, more importantly, the child has a right to know his father, BUT... given the drug history (do you know if he's still using) and arrest record you could push for supervised visitations and rehab/drug counseling.

It is not likely that he will get custody at this point (though there are judges out there that would make that call), but you need to show the court that you want them to have a relationship... but you want one where they can guarantee the safety and well being of your child.

Ev - posted on 04/08/2015

7,388

7

910

And to add to Sarah's comments you could also check and see if there is a legal aid in your area. They provide free services based on your needs and income level. If there is a local university or one close that has a law school within it, sometimes they do free work too. Its a thought.

As to him getting custody, it might also depend on what he is in jail for. If its a conviction of a crime that would make him a danger to a child, then he will not get custody but could get supervised visitation. You should also check into that. If not, he could stand the chance at getting visitation anyway and even overnights when its decreed he start that. He could also ask for joint custody too. Like I said it depends on what he is in jail for and if that would be a danger to the child. His arrest record, conviction and other documents associated with that would be proof he is not fit to have custody or unsupervised visits.

Just remember that this is just an idea of what might happen depending on why he is in jail for a crime he committed. And the laws in your state are not going to be the same as in mine. So you need to find out what he is in jail for, if it will apply to visitation issues or custody issues or not as a danger to the child and go from there.

If he is still in jail there is no way he can get custody. If I were you I would find a pro bono lawyer now and get custody, visitation and child support set as soon as is possible. I would not wait until he did get out and then he could have as much a chance at custody, child support and visitation as you do unless he is proven unsafe around the child.

Sarah - posted on 04/08/2015

3,879

14

1082

Sounds like a lot of hot air. I would say then take it to court. If you give in to the threat then he knows he can hold that over your head anytime he wants something. In some ways maybe taking it to court would be a good thing. If he just got out then he has to provide proof of job, residences, etc. Not an easy thing to do if you just got out. He also has to foot the bill for a lawyer and take the steps to do so. Many times guys are more hot air then anything and never follow through on their threats.

Tiffani - posted on 04/08/2015

3

0

1

He just got out, and we did a paternity test while he was locked up. He's saying if I don't let him ho stay a couple nights there then he's taking me to court but with his past drug history I don't trust it.

Sarah - posted on 04/08/2015

3,879

14

1082

If he is currently in jail then there is no way he can get custody. He can set up paternity and have that established. This would then require him to pay child support and back child support for the time he is in jail. Once he gets out of jail he could try for custody. At that time you would need a lawyer. You may want to talk to one now too just to touch base. There are some lawyers that work on a sliding scale or pro-Bono you will just need to call around in your local area to find them.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms