Shawna - posted on 09/07/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )
I need some help, I am a stay at home mom with 2 girls. My oldest is 4 turning 5 and she is biologically mine. My bf has a daughter who is 3, I have been in her life sense she has been 6 months old. Sense she was 2 we or I should say I have been having a lot of issues with her behavior. Her father does not see anything wrong with the way she acts he says that she is little and there is nothing that can be done. She yells at everyone none stop, she cries almost 99% of the day, she uses horrible language, she gets very physical when she is upset(ie.hitting,kicking,slapping etc.),she is rude to us and her friends, she refuses to share anything, she hurts our dog for no reason, She bullies my daughter all the time to the point of my oldest daughter will end up in tears and scared. the list goes on and on. I have been working with a child therapist to help me deal with her. I have been told to put her in time out, her room, take toys away, take her bike away etc. and none of it works for her. the answer I get from her when she looses a toy is "oh well daddy buy me new one" She has been telling me sense she has been 2 that she doesnt have to listen to me. My oldest daughter went threw a hard time when she was 2 but it didnt last long and she understood that with that behavior she lost her toys,went to time out or her room. She would never disrespect my bf in anyway. She calls him dad and looks up to him. Where our other daughter disrespects me on daily basis, she calls me fat, a bitch, a dirty mommy, etc my bf does nothing about it. He says that she is little and doesnt know better. If she askes me for something and she doesnt like my answer she runs straight to her dad and cries. if she gets in trouble during the day she will wait at the door till he gets home to ask him for whatever toy she has lost during the day, so before i can even get to him to tell him he has already said YES and given it to her and when i tell him to take it away he says he cant that is just mean. my bf works 7 days a week so when he is home i would like the time he spends with my girls equal time but our 3 year old freaks out on her dad if he pays any attention to my oldest daughter. We went threw a period where our 3 year old would make her dad ask her if it was ok for him to hug me or kiss me. I believed that was insanity and told him if he continued to allow her to rule his life I was going to pack up and go. I understand that we are blended family and we will have ups and downs but to me this is just crazy. I use to love being a stay at home mom but now I am ready to go back to work. My oldest is starting school next week and feel that maybe seeing as though our 3 year old wont listen to me she would do better in daycare. I dont know:( please any answers would help on how to make this better for me and my children.