Help me my 2yr old is fighting me and I can't find anything to please her...any ideas?

[deleted account] ( 2 moms have responded )

HI, its just me and my toddler 24/7. We live in an apartment, im taking online classes the best I can when she sleeps at night or naps. My problem is before we moved she went to mothers day out program at a church twice a week half a day, lots of interaction and learning new things not just a daycare. Then church on sundays and dance class on wednesdays. Now, we have church twice a week. Theres no schools here for her age, 2, they all start at age 3, she wont be til March. Today we tried a gymnastics mommy and me class. HORRIBLE. she has beenout of her school and dance class since May. Its been just her and I and she fights me and hits and slaps at my face, pulls my hair, glasses and clothes. TOday while i thought she would be great and enjoy like she does her tap class, she was screaming and having a fit the whole time. Crying wanting to do other things when it wasnt her turn. she would laugh and play alittle but then get mad and flip out on the floor screaming or running off. I had to take her out side set her on the sidewalk and tell her to be nice or we were going bye bye. we sat for a mintue and wnent inside. its just i miss the breaks we use to have from eachother. She loved her kids at school and class before and now she doesnt see many little kids as our church is small and no one else in her class. What can i do at home with her just the two of us if there isn't but one park here and nothing really to do. i moved here to get away from my ex so it kinda sucks. What do you do with your toddlers all day besides cartoons. We color and do playdough. I play with her in her room and she helps me make snacks and with dinner and sweeping but theres not too much stimulation. But when she fights me and wrestles me it hurts, she is heavy. i feel like ive hurt my sternum or ribbs some how they are so soar. when she flips out on the ground and im carrying groceries up the stairs and she doesnt want to go or we are leaving the store and she is having a fit then and i cant get her in her carseat or we leave church and she runs from me and wont stand still or have manners like she use to. if i spank her hard or not it doesnt bother her, just makes her more mad. I wnated her to go to preschool in the spring when she turns three, my mom said thats what moms do is keep their kids at home and teach them not send them to preschool so young. but shes been going to preschool since she was 18mths old. she was very independent and not shy at all and not clingy. i was very shy growing up and clingy and i never had the bravery to do anything by myself. i dont want her like that. so i put her in alot of activities. now my mom tells me that its a bad idea. my moms in another state, its just me and my little one and im going crazy with what to do with her to get her to listen, cooperate and not be in fear of me though but to not be so bad to me all of the time no matter what we do. if its fun or if its a trip to the store she flips out with a fit and i have to wrestle her to the car. its very hard at times i want to scream and cry.

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[deleted account]

I have a daughter who is almost 3. When we got to the "terrible twos" I didn't know what to do. She threw horrible tantrums, hit me, pulled my hair, she really did a number on me when she flipped out. I found a website and read the discipline information thoroughly. Practiced it on her, now she listens to everything, she even helps me with the dishes and making supper etc. Shes such a good girl! Shes very outgoing because of the discipline techniques i used. http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/discipl...
Heres the site. Hope this helps:)

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User - posted on 07/31/2012

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I'm a pretty inexperienced mom myself, my daughter is just under 18 months old. But I know what you are saying, we recently moved to another state for my husband's job and are living with his parents for a while. I am still looking for work locally but right now I work for my out of state job at home so my mother in law babysits while I work. My daughter used to go to daycare before we moved and I think she really misses her "friends" there and gets bored at home with just me and her grandparents all day. Anyway, I would guess this your move has been really hard on both of you and especially your daughter because she probably doesn't really understand why you left you left your old home. Also toddlers get upset a lot when they have no control over their situation. I read a book with some great advice, The Happiest Toddler on the block, by Dr. Harvey Karp, (a lot of parents I know rave abou his books). Anyway one thing he suggested was that toddlers usually behave better when they have choices, so if you want them to get dressed you might ask do you want to wear the red shirt or the blue one? If you want to get them to walk to the car you might say do you want to take big elephant steps or itty butty mouse steps? They might be happy to what you want as slong as they have a "choice". If you can afford it there is a lot of great advice in this book. Good luck! I hope things get better for you both!

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