Help me please

Teri - posted on 08/16/2016 ( 16 moms have responded )

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Long story kinda short. My 19 year old and my husband got into a pinching fight 3 weeks ago. They have never liked each other so I figured this was going to happen sooner or later. Anyways I kicked my hubby out and now he wants to come home. We miss each other but I dint want my son to be mad. I'm so torn apart from this. I'm seeing my husband on the weekends away from my house and my son gas no idea!

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His - posted on 08/17/2016

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Your husbands relationship with your son is very important. Your relationship with your husband is the most important of all. This is his home and he is your husband. You should not be sneaking to meet. Some family counseling could be extremely helpful. I'm including a link that I hope will be helpful. http://bit.ly/MoNdoD This number is for Focus on the Family and it's for free counseling. 1-855-771-HELP. I wish you all the best.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/17/2016

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As far as I can see you have a few options.

1. If your son is still living there, kick him out so your husband can move back in.
2. Keep your husband away and divorce him for his physical violence towards your son.
3. Have them both in the home, and have them fight and get physical often where someone gets really hurt, or ends up in jail.
4. Keep sneaking behind your sons back and seeing your husband.
5. Family counselling
6. talk to them together and seperate in a location other than home. Public, so they don't get physical, and work out the problem.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/17/2016

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"Try to make you look bad"??? What????

Listen, YOU brought this man into your life. YOU brought this man into your home with your son. YOU said they have not ever gotten along and they got into a punching match. You kicked him out (rightfully so, I would have done the same thing) and now YOU are sneaking around behind your sons back so he won't get mad. Honey, I am not trying to make you look bad, I am commenting on what you told us.

I personally would NOT want a man in my life that did not get along with my children, especially to the point of fist fights.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 08/17/2016

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You want to be with a man that got into a physical punching fight with your SON?? Wow he must be REALLY special to want to pick this man that you have been with for 3 years, over the son you carried and raised for 19 years.

You ARE right in the middle of it. Don't fool yourself. You are making it worse by sneaking around. Try adulting and talk with your son, and your husband separately to work this out.

Michelle - posted on 08/16/2016

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Your husband shouldn't have let it get to this point. Your son needs to understand that he will be living his own life now and you have every right to choose who you want to be with.
I can't stand my Mother's husband (he has done some horrible things to our family), but I understand it's her life and if she wants to be with him then that's her choice. It's not my place to tell her who to be with.

16 Comments

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Teri - posted on 08/17/2016

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I agree. Thank u. I told my son today that I'm going to see my husband on sat. He did not respond

Michelle - posted on 08/17/2016

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Terian: Rather than posting your own question in someone else's thread you should start your own. You do that by clicking on "Start a conversation"

Terrianstuart - posted on 08/17/2016

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Hi,I'm new..been trying to figure out how I'm gonna manage..I hve two kids..a 10 yr old daughter n a 3 yr old son..I got pregnant by a married man with my son,and he has to do as told by his wife he doesn't even make any efforts to see my son at all,no matter how I try..he gives when he feels to..now,my son keeps calling my stepdad"daddy" I feel hurt..I don't know what to do anymore..I'm planning to get a court order for child support..since his wife claims my child is a bastard,n jacket etc..thou he had signed the birth paper..what rights do I have? Only now,they're having another child..and he thinks I'm corrupt to talk the truth..about why can't he put in some effort to come meet the child,my son doesn't even know him,neither has he..he only met him once from he was born..

Teri - posted on 08/16/2016

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3 years and no he's not the father. Thanks for ur input. It's hard cause there's so much stress in the house from them both. I hate being in the middle. I had nothing to do with this mess! I want to put this in the past and yes move on but my son will be pissed If i let him come home.

Michelle - posted on 08/16/2016

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I'm guessing your husband isn't the Father?
How long have you been married?
How long were you together before you got married?
It doesn't really matter though, your husband (and child for that matter) is an adult and they are both being very childish.
Your husband is old enough to put aside his feeling for the sake of your relationship. Why do you have to hide your relationship from your adult child? I think you all need to grow up and get on with life. Life is far too short to be so petty.

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