Help my kid is misbehaving at school

Kristie - posted on 05/27/2009 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I have a 4 year old boy who is very loving and caring at home. Lately when he is at school he has been hitting and pinching his friends. Everyday it is something new. I am at my wit ends. We have taken all his toys away and n today I had to take away his soccer game for Saturday. I made a chart that he gets to put a sticker on each day he is good at school. He did real well the first month, now month we have had more bad days than good. Does anyone have any ideas on how to get him to behave and been a nice friend?

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Joy - posted on 05/28/2009

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Unfortunately Ive been dealing with the same thing since my daughter was 4 and she'll be 7 in August. We tried everything as well. We.ve been working closely with her teacher,school councelor and doctor. For the past year shes been seeing a play therapist but no change. We're just finding out shes ADHD. No treatment has been discussed yet but it was at least good to hear there was a reason for this behavior and not just bad parenting on my part. He may be too young but you may consider getting him evaluated. Keep me posted.

Donna - posted on 05/27/2009

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Boys, I hate to say maybe his and your problem. At that age I discovered my son hadn't learned to be as sneaky as the other boys. He was mirroring what he was learning or what was being done to him but he was the only one geting caught. For example around 2 to 3 boys bite each other. Ask him if their doing it first then teach him to make the teachers aware by saying ouch really loud. Kids have a wierd code of honor that they are taught to take it and not tell because they will be called a baby, this helps get around that. Just a note about soccer : if he treats his team mates good those are the poeple you want him around because they must behave differently. Good luck! things turn around just keep doing what you are.

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Edwin - posted on 02/21/2013

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Most of the kids that act like that, is because that's the best they know. He might be a good boy, but if he lacks of the techniques to get what he wants, he will do the next thing he thinks is best. He might lack of social skills.

Tips:

Model how to ask for things.
Act out situations where you ask him for something, he gives it to you, and vice-verse.
Create 3-5 words sentences he can memorize to ask, thank, borrow, and share things.
Partner with the teacher (offer support - ask for advice)
Learn about positive and negative reinforcement

Check out this video: http://youtu.be/X1wRkd7c6lA
They talk about how to address some challenging behaviors

Kristie - posted on 05/28/2009

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Thank you that actually helped a lot. I am going to let him play Soccer and I have been thinking of changing his Pre-School. I do have a feeling he is getting it from the kids at school because he is not like that at home, at soccer or when he is with his cousins.

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