Helpful comments for those who make negative comments about "another boy"?!

Veronica - posted on 10/08/2014 ( 4 moms have responded )




It was once an honorable thing to have a boy, but somehow-somewhere- people seem to have concluded that boys are the less desired gender..... And, if you have several like me, most people seem to think I've signed myself up for a lifetime of misery. I'm sick of it!!!!!

So, I have one daughter (7) and 3 sons (6,3,2). I just found out son#4 is on the way. Having grown up with only sisters, boys were one of the happiest surprises of my life. I adore my daughter and I adore my sons. Even at their young ages, I get compliments on how sweet and polite the boys are. They are loving, clever, curious, affectionate people who can sit through a meal and know how to behave in public. They have an amazing, hands-on Dad who helps me a lot. Even big sis had no preference on the gender of baby #5 b/c she gets on really well w/ her brothers!!

SO, how come people think they have the right to tell me how hard it's going to be w/4 boys or how lonely my daughter must be (in front of her!). I am just tired of it. Any suggestions on how to put people in their place or do I just smile and forget it... I suppose it's just important that I know the truth?!


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Sarah - posted on 10/08/2014




How can your daughter possibly be lonely when she has so many brothers to keep her company? ;). I think people comment "Another Boy !" simply because they don't know what else to say.
You know what a wonderful family you have, that is what matters. Also, people dodn't realize you get the same questions over and over and over.

Jodi - posted on 10/08/2014




I don't think this is about boys becoming a less desirable gender. I am the oldest of 5 children (the other 4 being boys) and my mother received similar comments 40 years ago. I'd just ignore it, or make the point that you get what you get and you are completely happy with that. I'm pretty sure they don't mean to upset you.

Sarah - posted on 10/08/2014




I have found you get comments no matter what. If you have a girl and a boy then people think your family is complete. If you have all girls they think you need a boy and vise-versa. If you have only 1 child they think you should have more. If you have 4 or 5 kids they think you are crazy. If you adopt then you get a whole other set of comments. Sometimes those comments are not meant to be hurtful or bad. It is just people stating and not realizing it comes across that way. Sometimes it is people that have been there and wanted the other. Sometimes it is people just trying to make conversation and not realizing how it comes across to you. And sometimes it is people who have been in that same position as you and can relate to the craziness.....both the good and the bad crazy.

There are several different responses you can give depending on the situation. Sometimes you will just want to smile and move on. Sometimes responding letting them know you are glad your family is what it is as that is what makes it perfect. Or stating that you would not have it any other way. Or saying something that the whole family is excited for another boy. That lets people know where you stand and guides the conversation down a different path.

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