Sheri - posted on 03/05/2010 ( 7 moms have responded )
Can anyone gove me some advice on how to deal with my pre-teen girl? She is acting out and giving me and her dad so much attitude all the time for no reason. Anything we say to her or anything we ask her to do, examples: hygeine, picking up after herself..etc she gets all in a huff, rolls her eyes, storms out the room, mocks us...when she does these things we talk to her in a reasonable tone, tell her that it is disrespectful to treat su that way and we try to give her alternative ideas of how to deal with her anger or frustration that will work for her without getting her into trouble, then send her to her room for a few minutes to think about what was said and to calm down. But this isn't working as she keeps doing the same things over and over again. Also another one of her new things is to pit us against each other, as well as take things we say comletely out of context and twist our words so what she comes out with is so far removed from what was really said it isnt funny! Then she goes to someone else and repeats "her version" to try to start drama! It si so frustrating and I am lost as to what si the best way to deal with this. i WILL NOT yell at her or any negative kind of disipline such as that, as she has had a very rough life and has heard enough harshness from others to last her a lifetime.
At one point she was thought to be on the autism spectrum with a tentitive diagnosis of Asbergers syndrome, but since has been tested at the CDC and the result was that she is not on the soectrum at all but they did give her the diagnosis of "Severely Emotionally Disturbed" I wasn't sure what that really meant or entailed, so I went hunting online for all the information I could find and there is so many different opinions...Is there anyone out there on Circle of Moms that knows about this disorder that could give me some support and a guiding hand? It would be greatly appreciated! I love her so much and we hate to see her struggling and not know exactly how to help and make it better. I am pretty positive that with more therapy we will find out that she has PTSD as well...as i said she has been through alot. Anyone with any questions or advice please write back to me, I would be ever so grateful. Thanks for taking the time to read this post.