Hi I am 41 and just lost a baby girl due to Trisomy 18. We were 12 weeks along. We already have a healthy, beautiful girl (almost 3yrs). Trying for another but very scared

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I am very sorry for your loss. I understand your fears. I am 42 and expecting my 8th baby. I lost my 7th through miscarriage, and I am afraid of losing this one as well, but many women have successful pregnancies in their 40s. Once you have lost a baby, fear is quite normal through the next pregnancy.
Talking your fears through with other mothers or with your caregivers should help. Also seeking out places for support - like shelaughed.com or other websites for older mums may help you. I know a lady who gave birth to her last two children at the age of 44 and 46. She is the youngest looking 60 year old I have ever seen!

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Loraine - posted on 01/07/2013

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don't loose heart. My doctor told me at 42, not to read too much into internet as the rate of older moms has increased dramaticaly in the last 10yrs. She said there was no reason I shouldn't get pregnant & have a healthy baby as i'd already had 2 even if the last was 19yrs ago. Like you i was worried in case it didn't happen. Instead I had coil removed early Oct & was pregnant mid November.
I was taking mother to be pills along with sea kelp..... not sure if this helped but i had read sea kelp helps with hormone inbalance & thyroid levels, which was why i took it.

Good luck & let us know how you get on xx

Lisa - posted on 01/06/2013

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Thank you so much for your response. Everyday I look at my daughter and feel so lucky to have her. It breaks my heart that she had a little sister who didn't make it. We are trying one more time, despite our fears of this happening again. I just hope I can get pregnant at 41. Feel so old:-(

Lisa - posted on 01/06/2013

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Thanks so much for your response. Wow, 8th baby, congrats! We were so excited when I got pregnant at 40, but we were also so afraid of the risks (higher chance of chromosomal problems, etc) and then to have it actually happen was heartbreaking. We are trying one more time but I am 41 now and worried I will have a hard time conceiving. There is so much stuff on Internet about how hard it is to get pregnant in 40's. It makes us feel so old:-( My grandmother had my mom when she was 42. Anyway, best of luck to you on this pregnancy. How many girls/boys do you have?

Loraine - posted on 01/06/2013

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Hi Lisa, So sorry for your loss. I saw this post after i'd already replied to your other one.

This must be a really hard & emotional time for you & your family. Nothing I can say or do can make it easier for you.

I looked up Trisomy 18 as I wasn't sure on the facts etc... It seems that the likely hood of it happening again are very slim. I know this won't help make you feel better or take away your fear but it was nothing you or your partner did that caused or could have prevented this.

Try to keep your mind positive & remind yourself, you have already created 1 beautifull little person, so there is no reason that you can't create a sibling for her.

Good luck x

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