Hi ive joined this hoping someone can help.I have a 10yr old son who still crys and throws tantrums when he cant get own way or gets asked to do anything but more worrying is his behaviour towards sex. if me and my partner his dad get intimate no matter how quiet we are he seems to know whats going on and wakes up, then all hell breaks out he will start smacking walls ,kicking our door and throws a tantrum crying shouting. If i try and talk to him he just gets more angry and wont look at us. ive tried to talk to him but all we have found out is he doesn't want us having sex. and throws a fit when i say he will have to learn about it next year in high school. pls help as i dont think this is normal

Tracey - posted on 10/28/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )

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Hi ive joined this hoping someone can help.I have a 10yr old son who still crys and throws tantrums when he cant get own way or gets asked to do anything but more worrying is his behaviour towards sex. if me and my partner his dad get intimate no matter how quiet we are he seems to know whats going on and wakes up, then all hell breaks out he will start smacking walls ,kicking our door and throws a tantrum crying shouting. If i try and talk to him he just gets more angry and wont look at us. ive tried to talk to him but all we have found out is he doesn't want us having sex. and throws a fit when i say he will have to learn about it next year in high school. pls help as i dont think this is norma

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Angela - posted on 10/29/2012

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i think it sounds more like a disorder than playing up. how long has it been going on? must be hard work hun. my son has adhd and also odd oppositional defiance disorder... he dont see things quite right. medication might help ease things. sometimes my son can be obsessed about something and wont budge x

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Tracey - posted on 10/29/2012

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Thank you for ur reply tracy, first of all ild like too point out we do not give in if he throws tantrums for things, second u say more importantly how does he know, well he is ten not 5 so most 10yr olds know about sex as learn in school, but i dont think he really knows too much and as for knowing what we are doing im guessing that he just guessed thats what we are doing. he has walked in on us once but we quicked stopped and just said we were cuddling so think he just knows. But to be fair due to schools, kids and tv ild be more shocked if he hadnt heard of sex as he does start high school next september . and believe he doesnt get what he wants by having a tantrum, but obviously we have to stop that activity if he is throwing a tantrum, as its bit of a mood killer anyway and dont wanna upset him when i don't know why he is upset

FoxyMom - posted on 10/29/2012

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A Dr is a good idea. But more important why does your 10 year old know about sex and know that's want mom and dad do? On the tantrums, sounds to me like he has you guys trained. If you stop your activity when he starts then he won and was rewarded by it stoping. Him doing this should have been stopped when it first started. He has learned he can get what he wants by a tantrum

Tracey - posted on 10/28/2012

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hi amie thats what im thinking maybe going to c a doctor . and no he has never been told anything bad and not been abused and he knows his dad not hurting me, ive explained its a natural thing u do when u love someone and told him about birds and bees., well tried but he gets angry and wont talk. yes he throws tantrums if u say no to things or ask him to do things he doesnt wanna do.

I cant even hug my partner without he trying to get in middle .

thank you for ur reply

Amie - posted on 10/28/2012

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Hey

I really do think you should see a pedeatrician on this. Has your son ever been told something negative about sex? Has he ever been sexually abused? Or does he think dads hurting mum and freak out? Have you tried talking to him at a time or day he isn't having a tantrum? Maybe he has heard school kids talk about it and is confused ?

Does he have tantrums over anything else?



Sounds really difficult and I wish you all the best x

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