hi moms here is my story. in 1999 i was told i was going to be a father but when the baby was born the mother said she was lieing because she did not want her dad to think she was sleeping around in college and it sounded believable. it was a huge let down. i bought the child awesome clothes and toys even though i thought she was not mine. i changed every last diaper fed her bathed her put her to sleep and dressed her for day care. that lasted almost two years then they moved with some tim guy. now 12 years later she contact me on Facebook and tell me that I am the only possible father and that she need my help she can't do it on her own because im good I just got in trouble for child molestation. She now says that she lied to me and told me the child was not mine because she heard that I was on hard drugs and in the guns and stuff. None of which is even remotely true. I remember her telling me that we couldn't go out anymore because I didn't make $50,000 like 10 did and s*** like my nose report on my face she spit in my face and I did not do anything violent. She's been married twice to a violent man which court records can prove and Tim a child molester. My daughter Jorian is anemic and have autoimmune disease it has almost died before. I am a nutritionist expert. I secretly talk to my daughter on Facebook for the moment and I asked her what she eats she said that they feed her pizza and sandwich and a mom is never home works at a bar. Yes the mother told me that I'm the father but now she says that I'm not again to the child she said that I'm on drugs psychotropic medication and have a violent temper. She is not only one to me she's lying to the child she's never there. This is just so wrong on so many levels I'm taking it to court and I'm going to defend myself I know all the objections and I have spent some time at the court house watching family court cases

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 02/17/2014

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Well, aside from being incredibly rude, Travis, and assumptive, you're also a little on the slow side for comprehension!

You don't have any legs to stand on, if you did a store bought DNA test after the child was over the age of 7. As I stated, in the US, the statute of limitations runs out on DNA testing in 7 years. You cannot request a court ordered test if the child is over 7 years of age.

It does not matter if you were not told about the child being possibly yours.

To assume that my answer

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 02/17/2014

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Well, aside from being incredibly rude, Travis, and assumptive, you're also a little on the slow side for comprehension!

You don't have any legs to stand on, if you did a store bought DNA test after the child was over the age of 7. As I stated, in the US, the statute of limitations runs out on DNA testing in 7 years. You cannot request a court ordered test if the child is over 7 years of age.

It does not matter if you were not told about the child being possibly yours.

To assume that my answer IN ANY WAY had to do with me "doing this to a past boyfriend", I'll tell you that you can take a flying fucking leap. I know these things because my husband & I were fighting with his ex, and I questioned the child's paternity, as there were questionable circumstances. We were told that, since he HAD NOT REQUESTED dna testing prior to the time the child turned 7 years of age, it would no longer be allowed as the statute of limitations had expired.

As I previously stated, CONTACT A FAMILY ATTORNEY. That person will be able to explain to you the legalities of the situation.

And, as previously stated, if you are concerned about the welfare of a minor child, contact
CPS, request a welfare check. That can be done by any one, any time.

Oh, and by the way, don't come onto a site that SPECIFICALLY states it is for mothers, and then get pissed off because you're only getting answers from mothers...get a friggin grip.

Travis Lee - posted on 02/15/2014

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Yea sorry your right. Bit i was very gullible then. And I don't think there is a law against being gullible

Angela - posted on 02/15/2014

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Did the store-bought DNA test show that you were the father? If so you need to arrange a court-ordered DNA test.

Remember that the grass is always greener elsewhere for teenagers. If she has issues with her mother then too right she'd prefer to live with her father! My friend's kid did this at a much younger age than 14 but it took a couple of years for her to realise that she was better off with her mother.

Have you any other experiences of parenthood? You sound very idealistic. The reality is completely different.

Jodi - posted on 02/15/2014

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Wow, Travis, that's incredibly rude of you to suggest I did this to a boyfriend of mine (BTW, I've never had a child outside marriage, but whatever). There is absolutely no reason to attack me in post after post after post simply because you disagree with what I have to say. I was simply being matter-of-fact and honest.

You stated: " i was told i was going to be a father but when the baby was born the mother said she was lieing".

RIGHT THERE is where you should have demanded a DNA test.

No-one called you a "dummy", but it makes sense to question why, when the mother clearly FIRST told you that you were the father THEN told you that you weren't, you did not do a DNA test and establish paternity. That seems like a logical thing for a person to do. It is a perfectly valid question, you don't need to be defensive. However, stating that you didn't do a DNA test because she lied to you, is bullshit, because she told you TWO DIFFERENT STORIES!!! Red flags right here!! No reason not to believe her? She told you two stories, and one of them was a lie. And you still trusted her? She lied to you AND YOU KNEW SHE LIED TO YOU ON ONE OF THOSE OCCASIONS.

I feel for you, I really do. But all the signs were there that the mother was a lying bitch 14 years ago. You just missed them. Now you need to see a lawyer, and even then there are no guarantees. If you are that concerned about her welfare, call child protection immediately, because a custody case will take time - if things are that bad for your daughter, you don't want her suffering until a judge makes the decision.

Continue to maintain a relationship with her in the meantime. The time will come that she will get to have a say on who she lives with, but without irrefutable proof that she is your daughter, you cannot obtain custody.

Travis Lee - posted on 02/14/2014

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You probably did this to a boyfriend of yours and that's why you're commenting and siding with her So why don't you just get lost And don't even comment on my post anymore

Travis Lee - posted on 02/14/2014

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At the time I wished she was mine more than anything but unfortunately I have no reason not to believe the mother and it made sense that the child was not mine I fed her all of her meals a day to change your diapers I bought her clothes

Travis Lee - posted on 02/14/2014

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So no I did not have the chance thank you very much if you're going to comment on my post please read them thoroughly so at least you know what you're commenting on

Travis Lee - posted on 02/14/2014

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I was told child was not mine I should have been given the chance to know the truth I didn't do anything wrong I'm not a violent person I don't have a criminal background my daughter is 14 years old and she wants her dad she tells me she loves me and she wants to live with me

Travis Lee - posted on 02/14/2014

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She wants to live with me anyways where I can give her the nutrition she really needs and not a bunch of medications like Ritalin or so oft that deplete the body of critical nutrients I'm no dummy

Travis Lee - posted on 02/14/2014

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She wants to live with me anyways where I can give her the nutrition she really needs and not a bunch of medications like Ritalin or so oft that deplete the body of critical nutrients I'm no dummy

Travis Lee - posted on 02/14/2014

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I did not know she was mine the mom disapeared and i believed their was no way for the child to be mine so you are so wrong she should have told me a child is mine period

Jodi - posted on 02/14/2014

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Travis, you had the chance to get it court ordered when the child was young. In fact, given the circumstances, you should have had one done at birth. I am not sure a store bought DNA test will be admissable at this point. I would suggest you talk to a lawyer. However, I am not sure why you have decided to wait all this time to try to get some level of custody.

Travis Lee - posted on 02/14/2014

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Thanks Shawn but I'm pretty sure its not right to hide a child from the father for no reason and we already did a store bought DNA. They have to give me a DNA test admissible in court because I didn't get the chance to know the truth because the mother wanted to be with someone else who made more money not only that my daughter loves me and wants to be with me

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 02/14/2014

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Well, first of all, unless you have proof of paternity, you really don't have anything to take to court.

And, from what my attorney told me, the statute of limitations on paternity tests is 7 years, so if the child is 12, you won't be able to request one. BUT ask your attorney about that. Things could have changed in the last 10 years.

At this point, if you are concerned about the welfare of a minor child, report it to CPS. Ask for a welfare check and investigation. If mom wants you involved, do it legally, get papers drawn up by an attorney, and have them signed, witnessed, and filed with the courts

Travis Lee - posted on 02/14/2014

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No that's a mistype. She said she couldn't do it on her own anymore and Tim guy had got in trouble for child molestation. She is not only lying to me but she is lying to the child about me she has absolutely no proof I know facts no reliable Witnesses its all BS. I really don't see how it legal for a mother to kidnap a child like this Jorian I missed out on 12 years and I never even got to know that she was mine I was so hurt over the ordeal back then in 1999 or 2000 1 I was depressed for a couple of years

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