How can I disipline my child?

Julia - posted on 06/18/2013 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My 14 y.o. son has no respect for teaches, adults or police. My son has been kicked out of 3 schools in 7th grade because he talks back to teachers, and he will throw things at them, just being really violent. He has been arrested 2 times because of drugs and for cause damage to other peoples properties. He was in a program that was supposed to help him be better in the future for 2 months, but now hes even worse. I cant deal with him anymore, because I have 2 other children with similar problems and I am a single mom.
Do I send him to a new program, a new school or something else?
Please help me

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Jodi - posted on 06/19/2013

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Ok, well, there is the problem I'd say. If you are not sure how to discipline children, you are going to create issues with all of them. Unfortunately, your lack of discipline has already led to your 14 year old having issues, and this will continue unless you get on top of it. However, it is VERY difficult to start providing discipline to a child this age. I won't say impossible, but I would say that you may need some professional help. Have you considered parenting classes to assist you? Are there programs for parents of "at risk" kids in your area that you can look into?

Basically all children need to have consistent consequences for their choices and actions. Putting your son in a program, without parenting help for you, is not going to be effective.

Julia - posted on 06/18/2013

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In the past I haven't really been discipling them in any way. I grew up in a ghetto with two parents who just didn't care about me so I don't know how to handle it when they do something they shouldn't be. I try to have serious talk with them, but I think they know they can get away with everything.

Jodi - posted on 06/18/2013

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The fact that you have two other children with similar problems, I am concerned that this is actually about the fact that you haven't been disciplining your children appropriately or consistently. Discipline begins at birth and unfortunately, if they reach this age and have not had appropriate discipline it becomes incredibly difficult to begin.

So I guess, my first question is, how have you managed discipline in the past? This might give some insight as to what is not working for you and help give us an idea on what you can try.

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