How can i get a deadbeat mother to pay ANY kind of support when she refuses to get an actual job that isnt under the table? I am a father of 4 wonderful children and their mom refuses to help any way with supporting them and refuses to get a job...

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Dove - posted on 12/15/2014

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She can be ordered to pay, but she can not be forced to pay... there are ways around her paying. Granted, there are 'consequences' for not paying (like loss of license or jail time), but sometimes you can't even pursue that w/out a lot of time and legal fees.

Michelle - posted on 12/15/2014

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Ok. Even if she isn't "legally" getting income, she can be imputed with at least minimum wage, I believe. A family lawyer should be able to help you there.

Good luck!

Amy - posted on 12/12/2014

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I get your frustration, my ex hadn't had any job in 2 years, that leaves everything on me. I've just come to terms that I will never get a dime from him, if he ever does get a job I'll have a substantial amount of money coming to me but like I said I don't expect that to happen.

Jodi - posted on 12/12/2014

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Not much you can do. My ex doesn't have a decent job and hasn't had one in years. So I receive a nice, generous $35 a month to support a teenage boy. Unfortunately, that means I've pretty much been destined to support my son all his life. It sucks, but nothing I can do about it, unfortunately, unless I can prove he is working for cash money to evade taxes.

Dove - posted on 12/12/2014

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Do you have a support order against her (I was assuming so in my first response)? If not... get one. I don't know about everywhere, but I do know in some states even an unemployed noncustodial parent is liable for some support.

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Tom - posted on 12/15/2014

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I have heard that as well. Thanks for all the advice everyone. I guess there is no easy way to get someone to be liable for the life they help create.. Crazy but I think Karma has been affecting her life since she decided to bail out without a care in the world. I found out she is basically homeless and on drugs, so hey.. maybe she is better off without the kids or being around them right now. Hopefully she gets right before it gets any worse...

Tom - posted on 12/15/2014

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Excellent. I do appreciate your advice. I do have a lawyer and don't understand why they haven't mentioned this. Thanks Michelle :)

Tom - posted on 12/15/2014

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She does not have anything showing she is working such as rent payment, car payment, etc. I do not believe I could prove that she is indeed working even if I tried. Thank you for the comment. maybe I will find out someday how to show her that our kids are the most important people in our lives and she needs to help them financially as well as emotionally.

Tom - posted on 12/15/2014

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She refuses to get a job where their is documentation of income. She is able work but instead of filling out the W-2 like most working adults, she gets paid cash under the table. Doesn't have anything tied to her as far as a legal job ( basically the same way illegal imigrants work and do not pay taxes) and doesn't pay taxes through being exempt. If she doesn't have a legit job on the books, there cannot be any child support taken out formally. She does not financially help in any way , refuses to send money, etc

Michelle - posted on 12/15/2014

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I understand what you're saying. Not all dads are deadbeats, you're right. If she is ABLE but REFUSES to work, you can take legal avenues to have her imputed with an income.

I'm a little confused, though. You say "she refuses to get a job not under the table." Does that mean she is working and does provide some financial support to the children, then? It's just not with a w-2...

Tom - posted on 12/12/2014

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Thanks, its very frustrating that she will not help.. Ive tried the lawyer crap and its more money I cannot afford to put out trying to collect.. The fees are outweighing the amount to be paid. Im not spiteful just need help. I raise all 4 of my kids without any assistance from her and very frustrated is all. Thanks again for the response and god bless.

Dove - posted on 12/12/2014

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Keep spending money on a lawyer and taking it back to court... or just forget about the financial support for now and let her debt pile up while you just keep doing whatever it takes to support the kids. If she works for cash and doesn't file taxes you don't really have many options to PROVE she's making money.

Tom - posted on 12/12/2014

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I realize this is a mom community but all men aren't deadbeats... I am proof of this . What can I do?

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