how can i get her stop crying?

Kayla - posted on 04/15/2009 ( 10 moms have responded )

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my daugher just started daycare and everytime i drop her off i try to distract her but she always seems to see me leave. then she starts screaming and crying any ides how i can help her adjust to being droped off?

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Marie - posted on 04/15/2009

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I am a Sunday school teacher, and trust me...no matter how much fun they had the last time they still pull the crying. It is normal for some kids and it does go away, it just makes you feel bad in the mean time. 95% of the time, they only cry for like 5 min after you leave and then they are fine.

Cari - posted on 04/15/2009

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dont let her know it upsets you as much or more than it does her. i went through this with my youngest son. it is so very hard and makes for a terrible day, i called a couple times in the day to see how he was and he was happy and playing. it takes a lil while for them to adjust to new people and new surroundings. just make the goodbye loving and reassuring that you will be back. after a while they learn that is the truth and they are ok. once my son said ok mommy go to work!! if it continues for more than a couple weeks you may wana look into the person watching her. i have also had a couple bad ones. when i picked him up he wasnt the same baby and when i got him home it took a few hours for him to be MY baby again. he was being mistreated

Geraldine - posted on 04/15/2009

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this will come in time when she gets used to the daycare.  It is very natural and common when a child is seperated from the child.  Try getting there a little earlier so that you can spend a little time with her until you go, this help with my daughter, I also encouraged play with other children, after a while the play time with other children will be more fun than mommy leaving, now is the time for you to cry for you will miss her cries of you to not go.  be patient it will be fine, reassure yourself by calling the daycare to see how she is doing.



 



hope this helps.

Sybil - posted on 04/15/2009

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I work at a day care and see this so many times..obviously the best thing to do is have your child start day care right away but thats always not the case...I've learned the child can cry for up to two weeks which can be annoying i will admit but at out daycare we are completly into distraction whether it be with the teacher there or maybe even food for a morning snack...just so they are occupied with something that makes them feel comfortable..she will still probably have break downs during the day but that is common as long as they have something there that makes them feel comfortable like a pacifier..blanket or animal/doll of some kind..usually the children that start out in my room which is the infant age range from 6 weeks to 18 months..there crib they have is there safe haven so some children feel more comfortable in there and relax in there so i know i've put them in there a few times just so they can settle down

Camille - posted on 04/15/2009

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Don't let her think it's such a big deal. I know it's hard but I just give my son a hug and kiss and say mommy loves you and I will see you after work. Now he just smiles at me and goes about his business of having fun (he is 91/2 months). Just be staright forward with her and as she gets older she will come to understand that mommy will return after a while. I think sneaking out just makes them nervous and worried for no reason.

User - posted on 04/15/2009

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I guess the first question to ask is "does she stop crying right away or is she crying on and off throughout the day?" Also, how is she when you pick her up and get home. Sometimes, it can be a control thing/separation anxiety or she may be trying to tell you that something isn't right at the daycare. You know your child. If this isn't normal ie she gets left other places and has no problem...then I would monitor the daycare more closely (surprise visits and such). I am former prosecutor and you can never be too careful...go with your gut...if she is not acting normal...something may not be right. If everything is okay...maybe go with her to the daycare on a day she doesn't get dropped off. Visit, play with her...let her show you what she does when you aren't there..ask her to make you something while you are gone the next time...if you think the place is sooo fun and cool....she will too. Take Care, R-

Tara - posted on 04/15/2009

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I have read: Don't make a big deal out of leaving, make it seem routine. Don't try to sneak out when they're not looking. Have the caregiver show them something interesting right before you say goodbye. Don't let the crying stop you from leaving, because then they just learn that crying works. It must be so hard to leave your little one like that, but I actually remember being in daycare and I would cry too, but once my mom left I always had fun. She will be okay, and eventually she will get used to it.

Sarah - posted on 04/15/2009

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Also just let her know that you love her and you will be back. She will be okay. I know it is hard to leave a child crying. She probably don't cry for long. She will adjust to the new situation. I didn't leave my in daycare, I left them with someone I knew, but when they started school they didn't want to go and leave me, but they adjusted. I have care for two of my grandsons every since they were born. When they started school, they would cry but soon got use to it and were okay. Your little one will adjust to going to daycare. Just don't let her know it upset you because she will pick up on that and make it harder for her to adjust. I know it is hard but it will all work out. Good luck. To bad you don't have someone like their grandmom or aunts to take care of her.

Michelle - posted on 04/15/2009

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my day care has a rule of putting their belongings on their hook signing in and giving a hug goodbye. they will soon get over the crying stage if u make it very quick and say bye and a hug.

Sarah - posted on 04/15/2009

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It is hard to leave a crying child, but I don't know any answer to that problem. Give her time she will soon get use to it and quit crying. She probably after you leave she will quit crying and be happy playing with all the other children. Once this woman took her child to school for the first time. She came out crying wondering about her boy she left crying. I been through that four time and it is hard, but when she left I kind of stayed behind and when they came out to go to breakfast he was happy as a lark. Your little will adjust it is going to be hard no you but don't give up. You can call the daycare after you leave and check up on her to see if she is doing okay. Good luck.

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