Confused - posted on 11/06/2013 ( no moms have responded yet )
My fiancée and I have been together for 3 1/2 years now. As soon as we got together I became pregnant with our daughter, who is 2 1/2 now. When I was 7 months pregnant, I found out that my fiancée's ex girlfriend just had a baby in the hospital. After DNA was done it turned out to be my fiancée's son. The mother didn't want him, so I decided to step up and stay with him. After all, I was pregnant with his child and I was excited to start our family together.. at least, that's what I thought! I took care of his son like he was my own for the entire 2 months before I gave birth to our daughter. I was VERY pregnant and was getting up every 2 hours in the night to cater to his needs while my fiancée just slept, never offering to help, and if he did on the rare occasion, would fall asleep trying to care for him. I never said a whole lot to him because I thought that he would help more once I gave birth to our daughter, but it didn't work that way. What ended up happening was instead of him stepping up and helping with his children, he practically let his mom adopt his son, which left me looking like a bad step-parent just sitting home with my daughter, when in reality I was just trying to bond with my new baby girl. Things are still the same today, 2 1/2 years later. My fiancée works away all week and when he is in on the weekends always has a million things he "needs" to do other than spend time with me and his kids. His mother keeps his son all week (I attend college and keep our daughter full time) and he is supposed to pick him up every weekend but acts like he would rather not even see him.. He does the same thing with our daughter when he is home..he plays with her for 10 minutes and then is ready to go somewhere or do something else not involving her..If it is just us home and the kids are gone, he is happy to be here, but once the kids are here, he is ready to go or even if he stays he just sits around while i watch them..cook, clean, etc. I do everything myself..especially when it comes to our daughter and the choices he makes regarding his son always reflect back on me somehow as if he does nothing wrong..idk what to do..i have tried talking, crying, yelling, ultimatums! Idk what else to do..Any advice on how to get him to man up and be a better father?