How do I deal with my 13 year old son wanting to go live with his dad

Esther - posted on 11/28/2015 ( 5 moms have responded )

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Hi. My 13 year old son is a very sensative emotional boy though does not get along well with my parents (who they live with) and his sister, a love hate relationship, and now wants to go live with his abusive father who does not want the kids? his behavior is declining with every passinbg day.

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Sarah - posted on 11/28/2015

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I am confused. You have a son and daughter who live with your parents, why? Your son wants you to change your lifestyle and then he'll come live with you? Why do you need to be more religious in order for your teenage son to agree to live with you?

Dove - posted on 11/28/2015

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He needs a stable and consistent home life... and likely sounds like he could benefit from some counseling as well.

Why do you not have your children in your care? He likely feels completely abandoned by both of the people who are supposed to put his needs first (you and his father), so he behavior and moods are very understandable. If you are not willing or able to do whatever it takes for your son... it's not likely that the situation will improve.

Jodi - posted on 11/28/2015

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I'm a little confused. Why are the children not living with you? How long have they been living with their grandparents?

Esther - posted on 11/28/2015

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thnk you. though situation is a bit complex. my kids are living at my parents for a few reasons. and we have been telling my son so many times or every day how proud we are of him and how muchwe love him... we hug him for he loves to be hugged and kissed still... though he is a sad boy and gets aggrivated due to this lifes set up. he feels the void and acts on it. I dont blame it though we have made changes and giving in to the changes we thought would be helpul yet he is unstable.. doing well in school but they too see him declining. He wants me to change my life style and then would come and live with me.( be more religious etc etc.) his sister is doing awesome but I hate comparing..

Alice - posted on 11/28/2015

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Firs of all, ask yourself what authority you represent to him. Do you support your parents during quarrels with your son? When was the last time you had family parties, dinners? What's that so important and good in you all that unites you? Try to invent it! Don't push your son, just show him your love and care. Good luck!

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