How do i help my baby stop being so attached?

Elyce - posted on 02/08/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My daughter Adryana is a little over 9 months old. I'm a stay at home mom. The problem I'm facing is If i even leave the room she cries till i come back. Dad loves to help, but she only wants me. Its heartbreaking for my fiance.

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User - posted on 02/08/2012

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It sounds like separation anxiety. She is the classic age for it. She will grow out of it sooner if she is made to feel secure that you are there. If you haven't already got one invest in a baby carrier. That way you can keep your hands free to get on with stuff and keep her with you.

Elfrieda - posted on 02/08/2012

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@Steph

Did you read Elyce's question, or just the heading? She's saying that her baby doesn't get comforted by those other people.

Steph - posted on 02/08/2012

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Babies are meant to be attached to you, it is inherent in a normal baby to seek close attachment to mum for survival. If you find that this is making you uncomfortable consider speaking to a counsellor, you may have some issues you need to work through, or could have a degree of PND.

Ensure your baby gets the love, security and attachment she/he needs, even if it can't be from you all of the timw. Enlist baby's dad, gran, auntie to come over and hold/rock/comfort the baby so yoy can take a break, have a bath, get a massage, take care of yourself so you can enjoy and be successful at caring for your special little baby.

[deleted account]

It's totally normal. Rough, but some kids are like that.



My twin girls only ever experienced any sort of separation anxiety a half a dozen random times in their entire 10 years of life.



My son, on the other hand, started around 6 months and was REALLY severe til over 2... and didn't really start to 'get over it' until he started preschool in August. He'll be 4 in 2 months now and is still a 'cling on' at times. :)

Elfrieda - posted on 02/08/2012

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Some babies are just clingier than others. :(

My friend had some luck with playing "peek-a-boo" with her daughter. She'd go into the next room, then pop her head back in. Just to get her daughter used to the idea that mom goes away and then she comes back again.



She's still clingier than my son is. It's just down to the baby's personality and phases they go through, I think. It's normal to prefer one parent over the other, and then sometimes it switches.



My son is 25 months old, and for almost all his life he's preferred my husband. I had to deal with a tantrum of grief every morning when DH went to work. Not that my son didn't want me, but if he was kicking up a fuss about eating or toothbrushing or bathtime, if my husband came over and did it everything was fun again. Now he's switched, and doesn't want my husband to put him to bed, now it's all about Mama. When he leaves my son just kind of looks up, "Bye-bye!" and goes back to playing. It's kind of sad for my husband and annoying for me! It's just a phase though. Try to help your fiance not to take it personally.



I don't know if your daughter is old enough for this, but I'm really trying to talk Daddy up right now. Like, before he comes home, I'll talk about how exciting it is, and then when we hear him come in, I encourage my son to run and kiss him. It seems to be working. Yesterday we had a "daddy's leaving" tantrum again. :/

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