How do i learn to deal with my childs dad deny her & have a baby with someone else?

Rebecca - posted on 07/23/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My 5 year old daughter, when I found out I was pregnant with her I told the father and he wanted me to get an abortion. I was an adult,23,i didnt think that it was right to do that, and to take care of the baby. After that I had went on with my life and when she decided to come into this world 9 weeks early i was happy and scared at the same time. She was healthy thank goodness but in the back of my mind it still worried me how do i tell her when she gets older. I believe that every child has the right to know who their father is. Because of this a couple months ago I found out that her dad is having a child with his current girlfriend,they had a baby girl, and he is taking care of her. I am not even sure this woman knows that he has a child other than hers. It makes me very upset because I had actually took him and my ex husband to court to establish paternity(to get him to be her real father) and not have my ex husband. He told my ex that he cant afford to take care of a child that he can continue on being her "father." It was brought to my attention that my ex husband was not feeding my oldest properly and treating her different than he treats his own child, my youngest.CPS and the court is involved. I even told my oldest daughters dad about the whole situation at court and he didnt even care. Now my ex husband is having a baby with a woman(she has 5 kids of her own) he started seeing no more than 7 months ago. I am afraid both my girls will get lost in the suffle and they will hate me when i do decide to tell them the truth. I do talk to my daughters "sperm donor" ,i guess people would call him, sister and well, his mom is able to se pictures of her granddaughter. They dont even make an attempt to see her or ask about her once in a while. they expect me to do it. I share about half time with my ex husband, and work full time. the little time i spend with them I guess im selfish in wanting them all to myself but i dont know how to get over it, deal with it, accept it. Its really upsetting to me. I feel like I am the only one they have that is stable,kinda, i have been with my boyfriend 3 years and carry everything for my girls health,vision,and dental. I guess im feeling very over whelmed!

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Ursula - posted on 07/23/2011

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Why are you afraid that your girls will get lost in the shuffle and why is CPS involved? I guess I'm not understanding you correctly. I'd love to help and give you advise, but I need clarification on your situation to understand you. =)

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