how do u get a 5 yo ready for no santa

Nikki - posted on 11/16/2009 ( 100 moms have responded )

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things are really tight this year and i hace learned that i missed the toys for tots deadline and right now unless i win the lotto (i don't play so i don't see that happening) i don't think santa is going to come my 9 yo will understand and the little ones well they don't know the difference but my 5 yo is i school and i know the other kids will be talking about it and i don;t want him to feel left out he is very emotional as it is and i don't want him to hate school or the other kids

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[deleted account]

SSgt ron nipper grand rapids mi 616-363-1601 ext 225 ron.nipper@usmc.mil

fax 616-363-7271 email this man tell him whats going on he works for toys for tots its never to late

Jodi - posted on 11/16/2009

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Just another thought, does the 9 year old have any toys they don't remember having, that have been put away for now that you could recycle to give to the 5 year old?



If I lived in the US, I'd send you some stuff, I have so many boy's toys here that I've been meaning to take to charity. I'll have a quick look and see if I have anything that wouldn't be too expensive and bulky to mail and I'll get in touch.

Sharon - posted on 11/16/2009

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Go to a church. Send emails to all your radio stations. Tell your neighbors you could use some help in making christmas happen for your child and talk to your childs teacher about helping him to not feel left out in the class gift exchange.



I talk to my kids teachers and let them know I can help out with the gift exchange if a child cannot participate, I will get a gift for them to give and they aren't to tell anyone. Not even my child that I am helping.



Talk to the school principal. People will pull together and make christmas happen for your child.

Mavis - posted on 11/22/2009

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i was really tight the year before last so i went down to the second hand shop with $20 and brought them all something so that they didn't miss out i have 5 children and i got change out of that.i hope this helps its the thought that counts.some of the items were brand new!

Jennifer - posted on 11/17/2009

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Check out www.freecycle.org this is a site where people give away their unneeded stuff. I post toys and kids cloths on there as do many others. You can post a want ad for boy toys with a bit about your situation and I'm sure the member community will deliver. Try it! It's a free site and it's local. You just search for your location from the home page! I really hope that helps. :) We are doing that a bit this year. New to them toys are better than no toys.

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Lisa - posted on 12/06/2010

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Try Freecycle. www.freecycle.org Look it up for your area - it is a place where people give away things they no longer need and other people can post on it asking for things they want. I am willing to bet that if you explained your situation and asked for some gently used toys, you would get a nice response. I've been on both sides and helping someone out is easy, asking on the other hand is a lot harder. Most people want to help.

[deleted account]



Hi Nikki~



Have you tried Freecycle.org?  ...A couple of years ago we were so strapped for money my son wasn't going to get anything but a few trinkets from the 99 cent store... then I found Freecycle in my area. I signed up through Yahoo groups and requested a Gameboy Advanced SP and some games.  People were so giving, that I got two systems and 3 different games.  I was able to make my son and a friend’s son very happy that year, for free.  I looked up Freecycle in your area and this is the link that I found-



You just have to sign up… it’s a wonderful program; you basically trade gently used or new items with others.  You should try it~ people can be amazingly generous!  I Hope you and your family have a great Christmas!



Nicole



Sarah - posted on 11/23/2009

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I would love to help you If you would let me I have 9 year old and 6 yr old. Every kid needs Santa. We help a family every year. A little goes a long way especially with kids. Sapphire23smh@yahoo.com. Email and let me know.

Cindy - posted on 11/23/2009

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Call a few of your local churches, I've never found a church that wasn't willing to help, no matter the denomination. By the way, I have 4 kids and I never told any of them there WAS a santa claus so I never had to deal with the whole is there or isn't there issue. (and yes we do celebrate Christmas) Fortunately most kids are out of school for a while after Christmas so hopefully your son won't have to deal with hearing about new ps3 and Wii's etc. Not much help but I wish I could do more, I know how stressful it can be for Mom to not have much for Christmas.

Janie - posted on 11/23/2009

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I always tell the truth. I've told my girls that Santa is the spirit of giving and that he comes to us to teach us all, how it feels to give to others. All the different Santas we see are just his helpers. I have told them the Fable/story of how in each country in the East, he is called different names and in the US and Canada we call him Santa Claus or St. Nicholas...We all learn this lesson by his example, and want to share with others, so we give them gifts that we think they will like.
You are not the first mother to not have "enough", for extras like this situation but you have the most important things like the love and hopefully the health that others might not have. We, in our family, make gifts of food that we make ourselves-together and actually give to others rather sparingly. I always used the stockings hug on the 'hearth', and put fruit in them and perhaps a small toy or something useful like a hair brush, etc. You get the idea. In more prosperous years I was careful not to indulge them with 'things'. We each had a package to open the night before which is always a pair of P.J. bottoms-all having outgrown our old ones. We all pretend to be surprised...we know we have the best in our lives by having each other.It sounds 'corny' but we have an abundance. It's all in how well we learn that lesson, and what we are measuring. It's a burden to have too much 'stuff'. We can start to love IT. As the girls got older we chose a family to give to, still with food and still not indulgent. You know as an adult, that feeling of happiness is greater to give than to receive. Children can know that to. It's just a matter of what we teach them.
I know you will have a loving holiday season..

Trina - posted on 11/22/2009

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My sons are 25 & 27 In retrospect children just enjoy the food, fun and family members. Have you thought about speaking with someone at your church. At 5 years old small gifts will do. God Bless you Sweetie

April - posted on 11/22/2009

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Try talking to your friends and family to see if they've got anything you can give him or maybe even help out with some money. I know the felling, my grandmother will buy 4 gifts for me to give to my son's. They each get one from santa and one from me. It really does help out a lot. When my 5year old ask I just tell him that the rest of his gifts from santa are at his grandmother's house on his father's side cause there was more room there. My youngest is only 2 years old but he does understand that it's something were he should be getting a gift. Some of my friends even help out too.

Jacqui - posted on 11/22/2009

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At 5 yrs old they do not work on how much the item is but how many presents they have so lots of little ones all wrapped up in a big sack would be present heaven. I remember doing this for my 2 little ones (when the eldest still lived with me) and putting things like colouring books, crayons, action figures and girly dolls, crafts items, dress up jewellery and on and on and on. They were unwrapping for ages and they loved it and whats more they played happily for hours and all I had spent was €20.00 on each. It's not how much you spend - its how exciting you make it to them. If you put too much importance on the cost then the spirit of Christmas and gift giving gets lost and the kids get spoilt. Have fun and maybe even prepare a small bag for you from Santa that somehow links to his gift so you can finish it together.....
Jx

Laura - posted on 11/22/2009

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This broke my heart, i im truley in tears, like the others said CHURCH my church helps with our community even if you do not attend, find local churches and tell them your story even if someone could donate one used toy per child it would be something. Also PRAY,god has helped me through so many finicial sitiuations when i look back i have no idea how i did it then i remember the prayer i said!!!!!

User - posted on 11/22/2009

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What about coupons for favors? a special story time, or activity, not having to do a chore he doesn't like? Staying up late to watch a favorite tv show or video? Making a very special fort or messy game? There are lots of recipes for homemade playdoh online? Those would actually work for your older child too!! Good luck and Merry Christmas!

Karrington - posted on 11/22/2009

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Quoting Kathi:

Nikki.... Everyone has given you great suggestions and I urge you to look into every one of them. I just wanted to share a little story with you..... maybe it will help.

About 5 years ago, we had just moved across the country and didn't really know anyone. We did join a church, but that was about it as far as "knowing" anyone and things were really tight. Pretty much anything that could have gone wrong that year, did and we didn't have 2 nickels to rub together. We had put aside a small amount of money for Christmas and sometime during the night after we went shopping for gifts for our son, they were stolen out of the car. We had left them in the trunk until our son went to school the following day, (he was 5 too), so he wouldn't see them. The car was in the driveway because my husband was making over an old computer table into a sewing table for his gift to me and it was in the garage. I was devistated. I asked the same question you are asking.. how do I tell my little boy that Santa wasn't coming this year?? And I suffered from a little thing called pride... the idea of asking for help was a huge mountain to climb. Someone from our church found out about what happened ( I never found out how) and one Sunday our minister called me in to his office and said that some of the parishoners had heard what happened and wanted to help and he handed me a check. I was so humbled and touched, even thinking about it now brings tears to my eyes. These people were strangers for the most part and they loved us and wanted to help. My neighbors down the street heard and next thing we know there was a Christmas tree standing at our front door. They had gone up to the mountains and cut us one when they went to cut theirs. The greatest gift we were given that year was the gift of the true spirit of Christmas. We were given unconditional love, wrapped in peace and tied up with joy.

Looking back now on what could have been one of the worst Christmas memories, it is actually my favorite. And, after we moved away and things got better for us (as they will get better for you!) I sent them a check with note to please pass the money on to someone who is in need, as we once were. Let others help you Nikki (go to a church or firestation and just ask). Someday, it will be your blessing to be in a position to help someone else.



This story literally just broke my heart. A few years ago my family heard a story about a young boy (4 or 5) and his mother living in a motel room because they could not afford rent anywhere and the mother had no extra money for Christmas (including a small Christmas dinner). Afterwards my cousins, my brother, and I decided that we would each give about $100 worth of gifts towards this little boy AND his mom. We invited them for dinner and everything (they declined, which is okay) but we still had the gifts delivered to their motel room. I think of it as the best Christmas I remember.



 While I was growing up my parents had financial problems and I knew this because I was often told that I would have to wait until payday when I asked for something at the store but every Christmas "Santa" and my parents did a wonderful job. I am still unsure if it was as terrific as I remember but my parents did what they could. In my above story I said that the Christmas I gave was the best and I couldn't even tell you what I got for Christmas that year.



The other women have great suggestions, most certainly follow through. I pray for you and your family, may you all have wonderful and love filled holidays!

Greta - posted on 11/21/2009

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Contact Ceder Creek Church in Toledo, Ohio. They usually have a toy and food giveaway. Also, call 211. Also, some school receive vouchers for coats and shoes. Contact your local school.

Amy - posted on 11/21/2009

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Dont they have dollar stores where you live? It would be a cold day in hell before I let my kids go without christmas and I will never tell them santa doesnt exist because im 31 and still believe. Just because some fat man doesnt go to your house on christmas eve doesnt mean that he doesnt exist. Hes in the smiles on my kids face christmas morning and when we decorate the house and tree.

Sherry - posted on 11/21/2009

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i can relate to your sitiulation when i first left my child's father i had nothing i didn't even have a place to live. i was staying in a womans shellter at the time and i was scared since my child wouldn't have not even one toy to play with and since i was staying at the shelter i told them about my situlation although both scared and embarrassed and they connected me to the right resources such as child service,churches,the salvation army and after speaking with these sources although my child was only 3 at the time the general idea is the same. all of these sources said they would call if they got anything and they did so i went to pick up the things they gave me and alot of them were great things and i even got lucky and my child got a princess kitchen from one of these sources as well and she was so happy and i was happy to see her that way.i do want to help you by sending something small for each of your boys so can you porvide me with more info if possible and i hope that some day when you are up on your feet again you will do the same for someone eles in your community or if another family who writes on here as well.

Janice - posted on 11/21/2009

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I feel so sorry for all of your children, go to your church and see if they can help, or do you have a social worker that could help you.Do you have charity shops? you can pick up some nice things there.Good luck to you all.

Jennifer - posted on 11/20/2009

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Adacountyfreecycle

Ppl post things all the time they want to get rid off. There are always kids toys on ther.

Tracy - posted on 11/20/2009

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We are doing a second hand xmas this year. Its not only easy on the pocket, it is good for the environment, one persons trash is another persons treasure and reusing is even better than recycling.

Lorin - posted on 11/20/2009

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That is such a wonderful memory to share with your children and I plan on sharing it with my son

Lorin - posted on 11/20/2009

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I have a couple of ideas...

I don't think that Santa has to be about store bought presents and there are many things that you can make into gifts. I love the idea that another mom said about a story book or a special photo album that you can make from pictures and other special items that you have at home. You could bake his favorite cookies or cake and wrap that up. You could also give him a wonderful home made invitation to have a special date with Mom and/or Dad where he gets to pick out what you all will eat and to watch a Movie that he likes which you can rent from your local library but make sure that it is his special time and mark that day on the calendar so he knows how special it is to you as well.

You might also want to take the approach that Santa needs a little help this year since times are tough all over. You could explain how many families are struggling this year and how lucky he is to be able to help out other families who don't have as much as he does.

You could find out how you can volunteer to feed the homeless or help out at your church or temple or local food bank.

[deleted account]

Nikki.... Everyone has given you great suggestions and I urge you to look into every one of them. I just wanted to share a little story with you..... maybe it will help.

About 5 years ago, we had just moved across the country and didn't really know anyone. We did join a church, but that was about it as far as "knowing" anyone and things were really tight. Pretty much anything that could have gone wrong that year, did and we didn't have 2 nickels to rub together. We had put aside a small amount of money for Christmas and sometime during the night after we went shopping for gifts for our son, they were stolen out of the car. We had left them in the trunk until our son went to school the following day, (he was 5 too), so he wouldn't see them. The car was in the driveway because my husband was making over an old computer table into a sewing table for his gift to me and it was in the garage. I was devistated. I asked the same question you are asking.. how do I tell my little boy that Santa wasn't coming this year?? And I suffered from a little thing called pride... the idea of asking for help was a huge mountain to climb. Someone from our church found out about what happened ( I never found out how) and one Sunday our minister called me in to his office and said that some of the parishoners had heard what happened and wanted to help and he handed me a check. I was so humbled and touched, even thinking about it now brings tears to my eyes. These people were strangers for the most part and they loved us and wanted to help. My neighbors down the street heard and next thing we know there was a Christmas tree standing at our front door. They had gone up to the mountains and cut us one when they went to cut theirs. The greatest gift we were given that year was the gift of the true spirit of Christmas. We were given unconditional love, wrapped in peace and tied up with joy.

Looking back now on what could have been one of the worst Christmas memories, it is actually my favorite. And, after we moved away and things got better for us (as they will get better for you!) I sent them a check with note to please pass the money on to someone who is in need, as we once were. Let others help you Nikki (go to a church or firestation and just ask). Someday, it will be your blessing to be in a position to help someone else.

Tiffany - posted on 11/20/2009

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the dollar tree helps beleive me it's what I do for my nieces and nephews and my own kids every year. the school may be able to get something together for you and church. churchs help big time. salvation army is a good place. good will not too much they won't help too much if at all. don't feel bad my mom was in these situations when we were younger and i become a secret secret santa every year for the person in the family who needs it the most so maybe even ask family to come together and buy one thing for each of your kids to help you out of breaking this to your 5 yr old. I know i have a six yr old and she's freaking out about christmas already. If it wasn't for her step father I would be in the same situation right now!!

Melissa - posted on 11/20/2009

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Contact your local food pantries. Call your local churches. My grandparents work for a food pantry and if you go in an explain your situation I know that the local pantry would be able to help. If anything, address the stuff you have from Santa, and explain that you couldn't afford a big Christmas, but Santa made sure that you had a good one. I only say this because Santa is the magical pull that keep the innocense in a child. I wish you the best of luck and a Happy holidays!!!!!

April - posted on 11/20/2009

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Everyone has such great ideas and most of us have been in situations very close to yours, so don't feel bad. You do what you have to in order to get by. The economy is tight right now for everyone. Have you ever thought of working at home part time for some extra money?

Fran - posted on 11/20/2009

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that's can be really hard, but I am sure if you go to a Dollar Store for $5-$10 you could fill up under your tree.....colloring books,crayons,little dolls, outfits,cars, some places have a whole wall full of kids things. Plus if your child is only 5 they aren't going to know the difference. Hope that helps.

Brenda - posted on 11/20/2009

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GoodWill is the best....and I plan on buying a few gifts there. For my daughters BD, grandma's sent $30 to buy her something. We went to the toy store and bought one groovy girl for $18. A few days later, I went to GW, and found TY dolls, similar, and in new condition and got 5 for $12. (She loves her dolls and the dog has chewed all the arms off, so we needed to replace them).

I'm headed to GW for Christmas. Last year I used the dollar store, too. Unemployment hit us hard this past year.

Jenna - posted on 11/20/2009

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Hi Sweetie. My name is Jenna. We are redicously tight this year aswell. Just a thought, but let me share what we are doing. I have a jar and in the parking lots, on the floor, the change I have left over from a dollar of change goes into the jar. I have a christmas tree painted on it. :) My husband found a dime yesterday, yup in the Jar! :) It actually adds up quickly. This will be gifts from Santa. My kiddos love the muddy buddy chex mix, I am making them each a plastic bag of it and tying it with a red and green bow. They each get their own bag! lol Then they are decorating and baking cookies for everyone in the family. brother,and sister, dad etc... hope it helps. Chin up honey, you will make it through this.

Darla - posted on 11/20/2009

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Bake some cookies and put in red foil and a note from Santa Claus believe kids know about Santa but don't know enough that they think they should get a lot of gives. Try and get them one good thing and the rest I would make bake and buy at the dollar store make most give come from Santa but make the best one from you. If you make it all about gift now what are they going to expect when they get older and Santa don't come around no more. Make it more about games and having that special time with each other make it about playing games together or coloring ect. Go see the light for a few hours. It is the time that is spent close to your mom or dad or both that is remembered more when they grow up not the toys or gift. I hardly remember christmas toy ect. what I remember is all the fun we had in our socks and our step dad sprayed the floor with fooseball spray and we danced for hours and then he tickled us till we almost peed our pants and going out doors and trying to play kickball in the snow. Walking on stilts he built us out of wood and trying to walk on them and the relay races we had and building snowmen and checking everyday to see who's melted the fastest.
Those are the things your going to remember that was the best about Christmas not the toys. The only real toy I remember is the packages my mom made to look like animals or cars but the gift was a package of socks but we like the boxes so much we didn't even really care what was in them we just didn't want to tear up the box. I remember the paper dolls my mom made us out of cardboard and she sat at the table for hours cutting clothes out of magazines and helped us tape them to the dolls. That is what Christmas is about and they will remember the good things not the items.
Thanks
Olivia's Grandmother

Brenda - posted on 11/19/2009

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i have been in you're shoes before ,and it is not easy.but like the other ladies have said talk to his teachers ,the principal ,and go sign up at the salvation army for a gift basket for you're family ,also you could make him some toys ,and he will love them ,and as time gets closer ,remind him that Christmas isn't about Santa after all ,Christmas is when baby JESUS was born ,and read to him about baby JESUS ,but as my grandma always said (if there's a will .there's away) and this is true ,,

Katie - posted on 11/19/2009

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Pray. There are other organizations out there to help with this kind of thing and since you have a computer, you can do a search to find out which ones are available to you in your area. Also many churches take up donations for families in need & even the salvation army & goodwill conteibute. Good luck.

Blessings to you

[deleted account]

Nikki definately talk to the principal and teachers at your children's school. For the previous few years my son's school collected hamper items of food, toys, scarves, mittens etc. for needy families in our school. These were donated by the other families in our school who were more fortunate. It was all done anonymously so we didn't know who the hampers were going to. It was especially good for the kids, they learned about the gift of giving to others in need. Good luck and all the best to you and yours.

Stacy - posted on 11/19/2009

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What about grandparents, aunts,and uncles? Reach out to anyone and everyone you can. I know it is hard to ask for help sometimes, but your not really asking for help for yourself. Your family and friends may beable to help, you just have to ask. Explain to them what is going on, and see if they will maybe draw a name of your child, and them a gift. Or maybe one gift for each child. Families are usually real understanding when it comes to kids, never hurts to try.

Kim - posted on 11/19/2009

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talk to your area family service they can give you some names of charities or churches and call the salvation army and local churches they usually have families willing to adopt families for christmas. I understand there was times when my children were younger that we just couldn't afford christmas and we found that the community was very nice and helpful also talk to you childs school sometimes they have info on familes who want to help others. Also check with your local food panties I know that our help with kids. What are do you live close to? Good luck your kids will have christmas even with everybody needing help there are people out there that will help. Hang in there

Missie - posted on 11/19/2009

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I think the best ideas have already been given. But, if you really can't pull anything out to the bag then try starting some traditions. Reading the Christmas story, watching movies, baking cookies, and talking about how some people have it worse can be understood. I know you don't believe it but it can still be an enjoyable holiday. And I think the salvation army churches, and the dollar tree are good ideas.

Denise - posted on 11/19/2009

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Perhaps your local church can help out. I had many a tight Christmas due to divorce and economic challenges. I did crafts with my children and we never did the big gifting thing anyway. Just a special present with special significance. Do as much of the free things that are available and teach your child about giving more than receiving even if it is just doing a little something for a grandparent or a neighbor who needs a little assistance. The lean Christmas's actually teach children that it is not all about gifts but about being together.

Aspen - posted on 11/19/2009

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How about doing a family project to give to others by volunteering your time at a charity? That will give your children something to talk about if and when their friends talk about things they received. I bet your kids will remember it for longer too.

Amanda - posted on 11/19/2009

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where do u live and how old r your kids. I know its a hard i had a bad year we had a house fire in july and i have 2 kids a 4 year girl and a 8 year boy we lost everything right befor school started but. and if you live close maybe i know people that could help.

Stephanie Gretchen - posted on 11/19/2009

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Well if your 9 year old understands then that is a good thing. Recycle some alum cans and go to dollar tree and spend 10 bucks. The 5 yo don't get the concept of money yet and at least it is something. The 5 yo won't know if it cost 1 dollar or 100. dollars.So I think it could be worked out. Trust me it is hard for everyone now but where there is a will, there is a way!!! good luck!!!

[deleted account]

There is always a church or program that can help you, but just maybe you could take this situation & make it a positive one by showing them how to help the less fortunate show them Christmas is truly about giving and just maybe that little miricle your looking for will be there when you most need it. God Bless & MERRY CHRISTMAS TO YOU & YOURS......

Kimberly - posted on 11/19/2009

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Quoting Kayla:

go to your local good will or salvation army


I work at a Salvation Army thrift store. You might have to go to the salvation army corps office; Its the one that handles all the things like this or if you have shut off notices, need help because of a house fire and so many other things.



good luck

Mary - posted on 11/19/2009

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I recommend the lego advent calendar
and reading books about the holiday
go to church

Melanie - posted on 11/19/2009

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Hey Nikki - I started a response and then it went wrong! I will try again....I feel for you and yuor family. I'm sure anything you manage will be ok. Seems like you have lots of other 'moms' with great ideas. I'm not sure where you live, but I have about 20 used Ben `0 figures waiting for a good home. My 9 year old doesn't play with them anymore and you are more than welcome to them.... Good luck xxx

User - posted on 11/18/2009

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Deff. go to a church... I know things are tight this year ... ugh they are for alot of us this year... so maybe instead of indiviual presents for each child since you are opting out this year due to lack of funds maybe you can take them all on a Christmas Day trip... Thats what I did last year we live pretty close to New York City so we took the train in too the city and just did alot of sight seeing (ALL OF IT FREE!!) then we hunted for Nija Turtles oin the subways LOL and honestly it was the best Christmas EVER!!!

Shanna - posted on 11/18/2009

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idk what state ur in but i'm in louisiana and we have a group called freecycle, they have them for different cities..u might want to look into that for ur city...ppl r always giving away toys, clothes, just about anything u can think of....

Rose - posted on 11/18/2009

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Go to the Lite 93.9 radio station they do alot of help to the chicagoland community they grant wishes. Also I can remember alot of homemade christmas gifts from things we had around the house when things were tight...Salvation army may have some help and your local churches.

Kate CP - posted on 11/18/2009

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Quoting Jennifer:

Check out www.freecycle.org this is a site where people give away their unneeded stuff. I post toys and kids cloths on there as do many others. You can post a want ad for boy toys with a bit about your situation and I'm sure the member community will deliver. Try it! It's a free site and it's local. You just search for your location from the home page! I really hope that helps. :) We are doing that a bit this year. New to them toys are better than no toys.


I love freecycle! :)

Abbie - posted on 11/18/2009

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Also at wal mart you can buy metal little cars ( like matchbox or hot wheels) for $.78 each... a few of those can make anyone smile.

Michelle - posted on 11/18/2009

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There are many foundations that you can go to. There St Vincent De Pauls, YWCA, Toys For Tots, and mant more. You should go on line and see what is out there. I would hate for you childrent to go with out this year. Please try your hardest to look for a palce that will donate alittle something.

Michelle Otterbeck

Sarah - posted on 11/18/2009

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You would be amazed what teachers can do to help. Please call your child's guidance counselor or teacher and talk to him/ her. I teach in a middle school and we will choose families to help at Christmas. Your family sounds as though you could be perfect candidates. Churches are also an excellent resource. I hope that you will find that Santa really is out there and will say a prayer for your .

Bernice - posted on 11/18/2009

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I would also plea with Toys for Tots.......contact the local Harley Davidson store...they do a ride for toys every year........churches are a great resource and so are fire depts.....chamber of commerce........There is someone out there that will help you...there shouldn't be a reason your kids shouldn't have santa gifts!!! Good luck and God Bless You!!!

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