How do you co-sleep safely?

Lorena - posted on 11/23/2010 ( 7 moms have responded )




Hey all you co-sleeping moms, how do you do it. I have a 4 month old daughter who just can't sleep through the night and still comes one or two times per night for a feed. I think she had acid reflux and doesn't eat big meals, but lots of littler ones. I'm going to the doctor tomorrow for the acid reflux, but the problem is that I need my sleep. When she wakes up the first time I bring her to bed to nurse her and end up falling asleep. Because of the acid reflux I can't give her a full feeding and then lay her down, her head has to stay elevated for at least 30 minutes and even then she usually throuws up. If she nurses laying with me she usually nurses one breast then sleeps for a half hour to an hour and then goes for the second one. With this she doesn't spit up, probably because her tummy isn't reallly full.

I also have a daughter who just turned two and is getting her incisors and molars all at the same time and I have to get up with her at least once per night as well. I already know the risks and have generally ben against co sleeping in the past for myself, but I've just gotta get my rest. A feeding takes about an hour ( 2-250 min feeding and 30 min sitting up. At 2;30 in the morning and again at 6;00, I just can't loose that much sleep. I already give her her last feeding at 23;00.

So, how do you do it safely?

I appreciate all of the good advice, but mom's who are against co-sleeping, I respectfully ask you to refrain from telling me I should not co-sleep, I'm looking for ideas not arguments. Thank you.


[deleted account]

Here's a pillow designed specifically for bed sharing. I wish I had seen this when my son was younger!!!

Here's a really good article from about safely co-sleeping. It covers a lot of what Laura said and more:

We kept our son in a bassinet next to my side of the bed. He was in arm's reach of me and I could easily get to him when he needed me. There are many ways to safely sleep with your child but you just have to make sure that it's really what you want to do because it's a commitment. Your child will get used to it and it wouldn't be fair to them for you to change your mind back and forth, so before you start, make sure it's something you can live with for the next 3+ years or so. My son is 3 and we bedshare. Most days I love it and some days I wish he'd sleep in his own bed but because I initiated it I just have to stick with it until he is ready to switch. Good luck Momma! I really hope you're able to get some sleep soon!

Laura - posted on 11/23/2010




There are co-sleeping bassinets that fit next to the bed so the infant has their own space to sleep yet mom can easily get to baby for a feeding. I do not know the cost of these devices, but that could be a valuable tool to invest in! Other precautions to consider: Avoid placing the infant between parents--moms tend to be much more hypersensitive than dads to a baby's pressence; make sure that the bed is a firm mattress--no waterbeds or really fluffy "pillowtops"; use a guardrail with mesh rather than slats or simply push the bed firmly against a wall (make certain there is no space for a baby to become stuck in); and make sure the baby is not overdressed or swaddled--the extra body heat from mom will help keep a baby toasty warm! There are some websites that list good co-sleeping practices for more information that you can check out. I co-slept with my daughter and she survived and is 12 now, so it does work safely! Good luck and sweet dreams for everyone!


View replies by

Emily - posted on 11/23/2010




Get a bed rail or co-sleeper so that baby can sleep on the other side of you, not between you and hubby.

No pillows near baby's head. No blankets near baby's face. That's basically it.

Sandy - posted on 11/23/2010




Both of mine have slept with us. My 8 year old actually grew to like his baby bed. My 12 year old would have nothing to do with a baby bed, ever, he always hated it.
I put then on pillows in the bed. It would keep them elevated, and would allow me to get some sleep. I breast fed in bed too. I think you just have to open your eyes and stay conscious of the fact that they are right there. If you sleep to hard, it may not work out. I slept so lightly after my 12 year old was born, that if any noise was made in the house at all, then I was awake.
Mine are both happy and healthy. My 12 year old slept all night the 3rd night home from the hosptial. It was great. My 8 year old still won't sleep through the night sometimes. LOL. Well, he will now, most of the time, but he usually gets up at least once a night, even if it is to get up and cut on the t.v. and go back to sleep, or run to the bathroom.

[deleted account]

I just also wanted to point out that with a 4 month old baby it's best to NOT put the baby in between the parents.

Alison - posted on 11/23/2010




Great article Joy!

I did most of my girls' night feedings in my bed and we both fell asleep. I tried to avoid leaving her beside my husband because I believe a dad is more likely to smother a baby than a mom. I was always aware of my baby even when asleep.

BTW, I think 1-2 feedings per night is perfectly normal at 4 months, although some babies are sleeping through the night at this point, many babies are not ready.

Bonnie - posted on 11/23/2010




You could try a sleep positioner like the ones you can use in a crib that help prevent a baby from turning over. You can also have your husband/partner sleep on one side of the bed, the baby in the middle, and you on the other side so there is no chance of the baby falling off the bed. Unless you are worried about rolling over onto your baby than that's totally different.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms