How do you deal with superior parenting?

Lana - posted on 08/28/2013 ( 2 moms have responded )




Their are a number of different people I come into contact with that practice what I call "superior parenting." Superior parents often think that the way they choose to raise their child is superior to that of other moms. Example: Mothers discussing child birth. One mother chose medicated, the other natural. The natural birth mom down talks the medicated birth mom because epidurals are "dangerous" to the child and choosing to go natural will make her child smarter. The same goes for mothers who choose to stay home thinking themselves better than working mothers, or breastfeeding mothers thinking themselves better than formula mothers. When you come into contact with these "superior parents" How do you deal with them?


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Ev - posted on 08/28/2013




I think that no one has the perfect or superior way to raise kids. Those that think that they know all the right answers are not always right. They do not take into account that each situation is different therefore the outcomes are different. So if a baby is in trouble in the womb, you should continue to have a natural birth because its best? Not if the doctor thinks you need to either have a C-section or induce labor now. She was not there so she does not know why you did the deeds you did. As for the child being smarter than yours...pffffft. How does she know? Does she have a doctorate? Does she know your situation? Many more times than not the answer to those questions is no.

I would tell the supposed superior mom that she needs to tone it down because not all things work for all people and that her methods might be fine for her kids but not everyone elses and she is not superior. Maybe brilliant as a light bulb.

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If I'm well informed on the subject they are talking about, I usually just walk away. If it is someone I NEED to make a good impression with (husband's clients, administration at school, etc.) I smile and nod to save face and let it go in one ear and out the other. I'm not going to make my husband loose a multi million dollar account because I don't like the attitude of a client's wife, and I'm not going to make my son suffer at school because it feels good to tell off a "holier than thou" mom.

Basically, I know the decisions I make for my child are the right decisions based on my own extensive research and observations. I do not make them because some barefoot & pregnant, all natural mom told me what she thought was best. I read books, trials, clinical studies, case studies, and expert interpretations of current issues I am concerned with. When she can put all of those credentials behind her advice, I'll give it a listen, and maybe read up on it myself, but until then it's nothing more than small talk.

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