How do you Deal with Your Baby Daddy who you were working things out with having another baby with another girl?

Randi - posted on 11/29/2012 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I've known my childrens father since I was 17 years old we had our issues and broke up he started dating someone else and I got along with her really well and was someone i trusted around the kids. Well things went sour between them and she ended up being pregnant, well me and him about a month ago decided that we wanted to start working things out again and I knew she was expecting the baby but i guess i never really wrapped my head around how hard it was going to be accepting that he has a child from someone else now. How do I get past this?

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Lacye - posted on 11/29/2012

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Unless you magically grew a penis and inserted it in her vagina, it's certainly not your fault she got pregnant. :D



When people break up, things happen. Yeah, you might have gotten back together with him afterwards, but you just have to remember that during that time he had a life. With somethings, you have to go with the flow. It will be hard for a while to get used to the idea that he has a child with another person, but in the end, it's going to be worth it. You will just have what we step parents call a "bonus child". It might have come from another woman's body, but you are going to love it the same and in a way, you will grow to appreciate the other woman for having the child. Well at least as long as things stay civil between the two of you and her.

Randi - posted on 11/29/2012

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It's not that I wont accept the child.. but how do I accept that he has a baby with her? I feel like it's my fault because i broke up with him

Lacye - posted on 11/29/2012

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If you truly love him, you'll accept the child. Just think of it this way, that child is going to be a part of him. You can't just block that out. It will always be there.



If that doesn't help, then this might. What would you do if the other woman had said she wanted to be with him but she couldn't accept your kids to be in the picture too. If him and her had stayed together but told him that she wouldn't accept his kids with you. Would suck wouldn't it? It's not the child's fault. It didn't ask to be brought up in this situation. If you trusted the woman enough to allow her around your kids, then you need to accept her child as part of the package to be with this man.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 11/29/2012

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Well, I guess it all boils down to how much you want to be with him. Also, if you can be a motherly figure to a child that is not yours. I would just make sure to use protection at all costs so you do not get pregnant and decide you don't want to be with him. Take some time and really think about this. Figure out if this is the life tha tyou want for yourself and your children.

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