How much affection is appropriate?

Chana - posted on 04/21/2015 ( 9 moms have responded )

472

0

26

My husband and I have always kissed in front of our children, ages 4 and 2 1/2. We also will hug and say "I love you". I see nothing wrong with this, it isn't like we are being intimate or even what I would consider sexual, occasionally hands will wonder but it never goes any further. Here is the thing, both of our girls will pretend that their Barbie dolls are kissing and will say "I love you" with them when playing at Grandma's house. (they don't do this at home because we only have girl dolls) This bothered my mother in law and she asked where they learned it and when we told her she rolled her eyes and made a loud sigh like it was a bad thing. I don't think parents showing appropriate affection in front of their children is wrong, I am just curious what other moms out there think.

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Jodi - posted on 04/21/2015

3,533

36

3906

Chana, my husband and I are the same. There is nothing wrong with showing caring and love in front of your children. Even some level of intimacy is not harmful, and can role model all the right messages.

Laura - posted on 04/21/2015

59

0

1

I think you have an absolutely sweet family! My family was very much a lovey family, my husband's was not. I think your children are being raised to see Mommy and Daddy love each other very much. You are modeling a wonderful marriage relationship for them! I think this is precious!

9 Comments

View replies by

Michelle - posted on 04/21/2015

3,555

8

3244

I agree with the other ladies.
Laura brought up a good point though, at least the children aren't depicting violence in their play. That would be far more worrying!
My husband and I are affectionate as well. My kids will always come up to me and say "Love you Mum" and hug me. Even my almost 14yo boy does this!!! I would rather that then no love at all in the house.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 04/21/2015

13,214

21

2014

Parents showing appropriate displays of affection are just fine, Chana...Grandma maybe needs to loosen up.

Dove - posted on 04/21/2015

11,631

0

1348

You are totally fine. It is GOOD for your children to see the affection that you describe and to know that Mom and Dad love each other very much.

Raye - posted on 04/21/2015

3,761

0

21

I think it's perfectly fine. Your MIL is being overly sensitive. My husband and I kiss, hug, hold hands, say "I Love You" in front of the kids. We also kiss and hug the kids and say "I Love You" to them. We all dog-pile and snuggle on the couch. It's nothing for anyone to get their panties all in a bunch over. My sister and I would play like that with our Barbie's, too. My mom and g-ma never had problems with it. When my stepkids see people kiss on TV, my SD will blush and grin, and my SS will say Yuck and cover his eyes. Kids are learning how relationships work, and (more-so with girls than boys) will incorporate some of that into play.

Laura - posted on 04/21/2015

59

0

1

There are so many children who aren't raised in homes with loving parents so I think your girls are going to be just fine! Often kids raised in homes where mom and dad scream and hit each other are just fine eventually (after some intervention). How much more so a family filled with love and affection!

Trisha - posted on 04/21/2015

551

0

13

My husband and I are also like this. His son rolls his eyes or laughs at us, but I think it helps reassure him of the stability and love that we have for eachother. I think that it is wonderful. :)

Chana - posted on 04/21/2015

472

0

26

Jodi and Laura, Thank you so much for comments. That was my thought as well I just wanted to see if I was thinking wrong. We want to be good role models and teach our girls what is appropriate and acceptable and I think that is what we are doing at least I hope so.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms