?? how much time should a father spend with his daughter

Angela - posted on 02/02/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I have a 4yr daughter and last summer her dad came into her life for the first time and maybe visited her 5-6 times and then he stop coming and she didn't see him for 2mo and then he show up one day and wants to take her by himself because he says that my 2yr old son who is 36lbs and 36in tall intimidated him and so he can't come see her with her little brother around he does not pay child support or help out. My daughter ask about her dad I just want to know what should my next stop be? The one thing that bothers me is that her dad use to be onto drugs and lives in a boarding house.

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Angela - posted on 02/03/2014

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It's my son and he is not the father. Also I'm not think or treating my daughter as rental property almost every time her dad came down to see her I had to give him money for gas and then he would ask for more. Also every time he was here he stayed on his cell text. My worry is that one he will be busy on his phone and not paying attention to her 2. Is that my daughter has some medical issue and he does not know what to do. I just don't see how his reason for not calling her anymore or coming by is because my son intimidates him and my daughter will not talk long on the phone.

Jodi - posted on 02/02/2014

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I'm confused. Is your son his child? He has every right to see his daughter without you around and to take her on her own if the boy is not your child.

To be honest, he is her father, and he has every right to a relationship with her. Just as she has a right to a relationship with her. You should have court ordered visitation set up. He could take you to court for visitation if he chose and he would most likely get it.

He doesn't pay child support? Have you filed for it? If not, then do. If you have, then follow it up. However, having said that, your child is not available for rent. What I mean by that is that his payments should not be paying for his right to visit. We do not "own" our children so we should not treat them like rental property.

With regard to the concern about drugs, just let the court know of his history (make sure you have evidence), and he may require supervised visitation, drug test, or whatever it may be.

The boarding house is only an issue if he is seeking overnight visitation.

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