How often do you all take a break from the kids and go out with your partners?

Elizabeth - posted on 06/05/2013 ( 5 moms have responded )

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My mom is giving me grief because my fiance and I go out once or twice a month and leave our daughter with a grandparent. This is absolutely ludicrous to me! How is this a bad thing? Yes she is in day care all day because we both work, but we need our times outs too. Other than those couple of times a week our lives revolve around her! All of our affection goes to her.

Now my mom is also trying to give me guilt because she is getting married next weekend and I haven't thrown her a shower because my house is not ready yet for guests. Uhh... hello I work, I'm a student and I have a toddler!!!! Plus we have had to get mass quantities of work done to our house since we've moved in (it's 50 years old!!!)

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BRANDI JO - posted on 06/12/2013

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I wish I had baby sitters. My husband works 3rds and we use to go out once a week to do brunch before he went to sleep while the kids were in school. We haven't been doing that. Which is making me depressed. We haven't had a date night in a long while which are few and far between. I think it's 100% healthy and you should take time to go out if and when you can or it will cause stress and fighting. Not good for the kids. You also need your own time to with friends (girls nights) :)))

Carlie - posted on 06/10/2013

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You are right. You do need to make time for your relationship with your fiancé. As for the grief your mom is giving you... I find it helpful to put my feet her in shoes. The fact is that our mom's come from another generation. So it is okay to filter through her advice. At the end of the day, you need to do what you feel is right.
Now... as to your mother's shower... we need to remember to make our mom's feel special too. Our mom's have sacrificed so much for us that they deserve attention too. If you do not feel comfortable having people in your home for a shower, then either have the party at your mom's place, at another family member's home, in a park or at a hall ~ remember to ask for help. You don't need to do it all.
As woman we are always taking care of others, our kids, our husbands, our parents, our friends, etc.... don't stress and do what you can.

Dawn - posted on 06/09/2013

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Your mother is a grown woman. I'm assuming this is not her first marriage. I doubt she needs a bridal shower. That is ridiculous! My mother was remarried 1 year after my dad died and we did not give her a shower. Nor did she expect one. Grandmothers do not get bridal showers haha. Seriously!
As for going out with your husband. I say weekly. Just don't ask her to watch the child

Elizabeth - posted on 06/05/2013

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Yeah I know they're two different issues, she is just giving me grief for all of it at the same time. We wanted to do an at home shower because I'm also planning and paying for my own wedding at the moment. She got engaged to someone she was dating for two months around the same time that I got engaged after a year and a half. My fiance and my mom don't get along so he didn't want me spending a lot of money on her. It's just kind of a mess but I wind up being the butt of it all.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 06/05/2013

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Those are 2 very distinctly different issues. You could have thrown your mom a shower or brunch at a venue. It did not need to be at your house. It could have been at a restaurant, her own home or her friends house.

Going out 2 times a months is perfectly fine. We all need time to reconnect with our partners.

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