HOW TO APPROACH A 3 YR OLD ABOUT DIVORCE

Melisa - posted on 10/22/2011 ( 3 moms have responded )

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I HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR 6 YEARS AND HAVE 2 CHILDREN. MY SON IS 3 YEARS AND MY DAUGHTER IS 6 MONTHS. I HAVE BEEN WANTING TO LEAVE THE RELATIONSHIP FOR SOME TIME AND JUST HAD HIGH HOPES AND NOT ENOUGH NERVE. AND NOW I HAVE 2 CHILDREN TO CARE FOR. I HAVE MADE THE DECISION TO FOLLOW THRU WITH LEAVING MY HUSBAND. I AM A LITTLE NERVOUS ABOUT IT BUT AM READY. I HAVE ALOT OF SUPPORT FROM FRIENDS AND FAMILY. I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW WHAT ANYONE THINKS ABOUT HOW TO APPROACH MY SON ON THIS MATTER.

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Cynthia - posted on 10/24/2011

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I am sorry your marriage has failed. i hate to hear about a family spiting up. there is no good way to approach it. be sure you don't expect them to make you feel better about it when you tell them. be strong to not lean on him. don't get emotional don't cry. don't tell him it is for the best. don't say mom and dad don't love each other any more. just tell him as little as you have to. divorce sucks there is no way to make it suck less. poor little guy. it is going to break his heart.

Teresa - posted on 10/24/2011

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If the father of the children is a good dad and a safe dad for the kids, make sure, above all else, that you both remember that even after a divorce you are still both parents. Help your 3 year old to understand that mummy and daddy will be happier and get a long better apart, but that both of you will still love him and care for him. It won't be easy for anyone, but you have to do what is right for you. Remember it is better to have divorced happy parents than arguing married ones.

JuLeah - posted on 10/22/2011

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Simple and matter of fact. Don't make Dad the bad guy in any way. Never say anything bad about Dad.

Moving is a big deal for a little one, a lot of stress.

Assure him you are there for him - hopefully Dad will be there too

Make sure your friends and family are also there to support him

Let him lead with the questions - if he asks, answer honestly and simply

If he doesn't ask, the answer might not be needed

Just make sure he knows he can ask ... model for him dealing with such stress - it is okay to be confused, upset, sad .... it is okay to not know how to feel

Good luck

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