How to comfort my son after his father failed to pick him up at school AGAIN

Maria - posted on 06/19/2014 ( 4 moms have responded )

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Today was my sons last day if school.
His deadbeat father can never pick him up on time so I normally have my mother pick him up, but today the school was having a picnic for the children and one of the parents needed to show up with a lunch and to spend time with them.
Since I know his father well I asked my son last night to call him and remind him not to be late and bring him lunch.
Well not only did he not show up to the picnic, he didn't pick him up at all!!
His father calls and leaves me a voicemail crying saying how he's never done this before (he does it all the time)and he's so sorry but he fell asleep.
Please advise me how I should comfort my son so his fathers irresponsibility does not scar him.
Also how do I handle his father. I would like to take away his weekly visitations because of this.

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Ev - posted on 06/19/2014

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I agree with Little Miss on this but I must add if his weekly visits are set by the court then you have to go back and have a very valid reason for him to not have those visits. Its not up to you to decide if he should see the boy or not. He has the same right to a relationship as you do. It is his choice to not come but you can not force a grown man to do what he is not going to do. Take it up with a lawyer though to be sure of what your options are. But as I said, you would have to have a vaild reason to take his visitation rights away. If this has gone on for a good time frame, you might get them supervised or something.

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Maria - posted on 06/19/2014

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Evelyn, thank you for your advise as well.
I'm planning to go to court and ask if his weekly visitations can be revoked since he has repeatedly failed to pick him up from school, in turn I have been left scrambling to find someone to pick him up.
His preschool had a policy in place where the child would be kicked out of school if he/she was not pickup up on time more than 3 times. I was the exception to the rule once they found out my situation.
I really I can get all this resolved soon.
Thanks again for the advise.

Maria - posted on 06/19/2014

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Thank you Little Miss, I really appreciate your advise.
My son is 6 years old. I feel so bad because even though his father is a terrible father figure, my son sees him as his hero.
But I will tell him exactly what happened as you said.

~♥Little Miss - posted on 06/19/2014

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Wowza, what a stand up father.

I would not sugar coat anything with your son. How old is he? I would let him know that daddy fell asleep and he is really sorry to have missed his picnic. Let him know how much you love him, and that daddy will not be in charge of special days at school any more. Not just that, but he will not be picking him up from school either.

Then, take your son out for an extra special picnic just the two of you. Make a day of it, and show him how important he is.

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