How to cope with the pain of my son in jail

Socorro - posted on 04/21/2015 ( 8 moms have responded )

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My son was sentenced to 2 years in prison , i cant find piece in my life , i get mad easily, i don't know to to do it

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Laura - posted on 04/21/2015

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Socorro, I am so sorry you are having to endure this. I can not imagine having my child in prison for 2 years! First of all, regardless of what PP said it is not your fault he is in prison. You did nothing to contribute to this. I am guessing since it is only 2 years it isn't a horrible crime like murder, rape, etc. My best advice is to pray for him! That would be what I would want from my mother. Visit him as much as your heart allows and be sure to keep yourself busy; it will keep you from worrying and losing your mind. Keep in mind also that the movies and television make prison look much worse than what it is. My uncle was locked up and he said none of the abuse, etc actually goes on in prison. So take heart about that! Hugs to you, Socorro!

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Laura - posted on 04/21/2015

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I see. That makes sense. It was that inflammatory comment I was referring to. The lady was very unkind. I couldn't believe she wrote something so mean! Thank you for the tips, I will keep them in mind!

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 04/21/2015

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Hmmm...That must have been our resident troll, which was gone before I posted. Therefore, when you referred to PP, that, my dear, was me.

Chip?!? LMAO. Nope, just sick and tired of people assuming things. I respond to what's posted, nothing more, nothing less.

Be on the lookout for goofy screennames like 'jam', 'kitties', 'iloveanimals', kittycat, anything that looks like a bored 13 YO...and that will be our resident troll. We ignore her.

Laura - posted on 04/21/2015

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You need to just kind of calm down a bit. You have a bit of a chip on your shoulder.

Laura - posted on 04/21/2015

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I was actually referring to the first poster, not you. The first poster said she probably hit him and that was why he was in jail.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 04/21/2015

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" regardless of what PP said it is not your fault he is in prison " Oh Please. Read what I posted. I DID NOT SAY that it was the OP's fault that her son made poor choices. I said, (and I'll repeat it here) "IF YOU RAISED HIM TO THE BEST OF YOUR ABILITY, it is not your fault that he made poor choices"

Anyone in this situation would benefit from counseling to help them recognize that.

One of my best friends has a kid in jail for stupid choices. I said the same to her: "Lynn, you raised him the best you could, and gave him the right tools. It IS NOT YOUR FAULT that he made the stupid choices that he did." That friend recognized and appreciated that fact.
My own niece was jailed for being stupid (and drunk) I don't love her any less, but you can darn well bet that I didn't pull my punches either. If someone (ANYONE) is going to make the stupid choice that lands them behind bars, they need a good dose of reality.
The MOMS in that situation need to recognize that it WAS NOT how they raised the kid, and move forward.

♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 04/21/2015

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Well, your son obviously made some poor choices to be incarcerated.
Perhaps counseling would help you get back to a good place. If you raised him as well as you were able, you are not to blame for his poor choices as an adult.

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