How to deal with my 16 year old who literally treats my like DIRT!!! Everyday!!! No RESPECT ever!!!

Laura - posted on 08/17/2014 ( 2 moms have responded )

3

0

1

This is in fact a true statement !!! I deal with this on a daily basis!!!! It is a constant!!!! I'm truly devastated!!! I feel my daughter despises me!!!! Even though I give her ALL my love ... Tell her how proud I am of her constantly and give her the world !!!! Within reason of course!!! I am physically and emotionally ill !!! Literally !! And she could care less!!!! It's All about HER!!!!! She says she doesn't have to respect me if I don't respect her or tell her what to do ,,, example .. What time to be home or just text me or call and let me know what time you be home or just simply ask where are you???? Really???? Am I not her mother !!!! She's only 16!!!!! She has sooo much Anger built up inside her!!!! And I don't know if its all toward me or just about certain things in life??? Help!!!!! Plz ... I'm scared... Terrified of losing her ... Or she'll do something crazy out if spite or I'm going to end up dying a very young woman and I believe she will ( or maybe she won't have regrets) maybe she'll be happy I'm gone!!!! :((( this whole thing has broken my heart and my faith !!! I love my daughter soo much!!!! BUT She cannot treat me like garbage!!!!
Devastated Mom!!

2 Comments

View replies by

Lori - posted on 08/18/2014

126

0

0

I somehow survived teenagers - they are adults now. I had a difficult daughter.
there comes a point in time when you have to take everything away from them. you mentioned her calling and telling you where she is...if she is acting this disrespectfully, she shouldn't be out at all and she shouldn't have her phone (I am assuming you are paying for the phone). and I HOPE she is not using your car either (those keys would be gone asap). I even told my kids that if I took the car away and I caught them taking it, I would call the police myself.
does she have a job? if not, she has no money unless you are giving her some.
cut her off - you are only responsible for food, shelter and clothing. until she can learn respect, she won't be doing much else. if she doesn't like it? oh well...maybe she can learn some respect.

Josie - posted on 08/17/2014

11

0

1

from a kids perspective:

I'm going through similar things right now with my mom but from the kids side of the fight, its a whole new world! i would suggest maybe giving her a little space at first, then show her that you can understand or imagine things in a teenagers world that could make her upset, but that she can't take out all this anger that she saves, to build up inside just to bring out on you,(but maybe your the only person, or thing she knows right now that will except her anger and take it, and maybe feel beaten down about it.) cause thats just not fair. And if she really is building up all of her anger just for you like you were saying, then maybe you could consider getting her into a very active sport that she could use to help get out all of that anger and release it. (probably not tennis though…)anyways after you tell her the whole "i can understand why you would be mad at this point in life…i know its hard…its gonna be okay", just explain that you think she's being a little mean, and harsh and if she continues that it could lead to consequences. But of course she'll get mad (i probably would) so just ask her to go to her room fro awhile, explain that this isn't a punishment, but you just want her to put herself in your shoes, and make her realize that she has been pretty harsh on you lately.

-from a kids perspective, Josie M-

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms