How to discourage my 10-yr. old boy from computer gaming...


Sherry - posted on 05/24/2010




involve him in extra caricular activities.. baseball... hockey, tenis, track and field.... if he doesn't already have chores then give him some

or set rules... only x amount of time on weekdays (If homework and studying is done) and only X amount of time on weekends...

Teach him board games, word games, CRIB, send him to the backyard to play... if you can invest in a pet (a dog maybe??-- it's his dog, his responsibility to walk, feed, play etc)

Talk to his friends parents and ask them that when your boy is around that video games be kept to a minimum because you feel it doesn't teach him anything (they really don't-- I'm having problems with my husband and his games at the moment)

Teach him woodworking, mechanics... the old way of doing things (find a cheap toaster and ask him if he can figure out how it works by taking it apart and putting it back together) these are best supervised but... if he can take it apart put it back together plug it in and IT WORKS.. awesome!

LOL Joanne I'd like to know how to do that with my 38 year old husband.. he's worse then any kid if I say enough and it's family time (or his damn dungeons and dragons game or warhammer that he works on figurines for all bloody week)


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[deleted account]

You're the parent,you make the rules. It's not a matter of discouraging him, it's a matter of telling him.

[deleted account]

if you dont want him to play them dont let him.. you're the mom.. you can give him limits if you want to.. time, what he plays, when.. thats not his decision

Firebird - posted on 05/26/2010




Do what my mom did with us. Although it was nintendo, not computer games. Kick him outside and tell him he's not allowed back in the house until he's dirty and covered in grass stains. You're the parent. Set rules on when he can play and for how long, and enforce those rules.

Alison - posted on 05/25/2010




What exactly is the problem? Is he spending too much time on the computer? Is there something wrong with the games he is playing? Is he neglecting his homework?

Explain to him why you want him to stop or spend less time on the computer. Then explain how you will enforce it. It could also serve as a reward or privilege.

Keep in mind that this is something that most guys (boys and men) really enjoy and it may be more effective to find a compromise rather than cutting it out altogether.

[deleted account]

One of the mmorpgs has brought out a new "skill" that you have to complete the task before you get any experience points. If you log out you basically loose your investment of time in the game as you get no points. I really hate this! it locks kids and adults into the computer until the task is done. This is just wrong. It leads to learned behavior of "I must finish playing before I can stop."

We use a token system they are worth 25 cents, that buys you 15 min of play time. We pay our kids per job... and sweeping the floor is worth 10 cents...

Another way is play outside doing physical activity. For every 15 minutes they play outside they can earn a token as well.

we do have a OLD internet card broken computer in our kids room but it only has Mom approved games on it and I have to log them into it before they can use it. Any internet activity is done on the living room computer in full view of Mom and Dad.

Amy - posted on 05/25/2010




I agree you control the computer so make sure you set time limits, but I have another suggestion that I haven't seen mentioned have you thought about sending him to a summer camp that maybe teaches him computer programming or how to develop these games. Look into a local community college sometimes they offer non credited courses that someone can take. It's just am idea because then he can learn about something he is interested in!

Angie - posted on 05/25/2010




Set limits for when your son can use the computer. During the school week the computer is only used for school work. On the weekend and summer, each child only uses the computer for games for 1 hour a day - if they sit at the computer together looking at something it counts against both of their times. Be tough, don't let him set the rules. You're the mom, you set them and stick to them. Good luck......

Jodi - posted on 05/24/2010




We don't have a computer in the kids rooms, only in the living area, and it is fully passworded. So basically, they can only use it with permission. With regard to Playstation and Wii, again, they can only use it with permission because they are in the living areas of the house, and as the parent, if I choose to disconnect it because they are not packing up when I tell them to, I do. Any tantrum over my requet to pack it up means it is banned for X number of days. And if they continue to carry on, they will be banned for longer. I think the longest we got up to was a month. It was amazing how quickly they learned to respect the limits.

Candice - posted on 05/24/2010




I agree with JuLeah 100% You are the parent and you need to let your child know the limitations! If you let your child get away with playing games all the time that will become a problem, children thrive off of boundries, I have my 2 year Early Childhood Delevopment it is one of the big things that they teach

Karen - posted on 05/24/2010




My son is 9 - he has had the computer in his room since he was 5 - as we have so little room in our place that it was the only place to put it - we have Shaw Secure with parental controls on it - every site he goes to we see - it has sites we don't want him on blocked - and we set a countdown timer on there and when time is up - it shuts down. Since allowing my son to have a computer his imagination has exploded - he looks up things he wants to know - he plays games that have taught him to read and make friends and even the value of money - so some computer time is not bad. Just set limits and make sure he knows that whatever he does on there you can see and there will be consequences to not listening and so forth...the computer can be used as a great learning tool if it is presented as such. If you are unsure how to set up parental controls and what to use for a program just check with a local computer shop - they would be able to help you without a doubt.

Iridescent - posted on 05/24/2010




Take it away. Disconnect it. Supervision. Request a built in lock in the tower or laptop - they exist, we have them. Passwords. Remove the modem or router. So many options.

JuLeah - posted on 05/24/2010




Well, on the one hand, you are the parent. You choose if you even have a computer in your house. You choose if it is connected to the web. You choose if he has games.
I advise the computer if you have one, be in full view of you at all times. In the kitchen or living room, never in a bed room where you can't watch what he is doing.
You pick the games
This can be used as a teaching moment. He can learn to self set limits and learn self control, which is a skill he will need for life
He can learn homwork before games, breaks for out door games and friend time ....
You can set up times with him, assuming homework is done, he can play for one hour, or one half hour an afternoon
If he can't set limits for himself, you set them until he gain the maturity
If it is a problem, the games simple go away for a time.

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