How to get a breastfed child to USE a binky/pacifier!?

Courtney - posted on 01/13/2010 ( 16 moms have responded )

147

18

11

Hi, my daughter is only breastfed and she WILL NOT take a pacifier! She is 2 months old and it is getting to where we can't do anything!! If we are out and she is fussy, she wants to be at the boob...not to eat, she will just suck for a second and then pass right out! She is gaining weight just fine, 95% fine, so I figure that introducing a binky won't cause her to STOP eating and lose any weight. I just need to figure something out so that if we are out and about I don't have to drop everything to whip my breast out for 2 seconds of suckling and then a happy baby! She is on there around the clock!! She sleeps for like 4-5 hour stretches at night, but during the day, we can't leave the house because of her constant need to be at the breast. I don't want to neglect her from it, but I have to go buy groceries run and buy diapers eventually!! I can't stay cooped up in the house! PLEASE HELP!!! I have tried the NUK pacifers because the lactation nurse said that those are the best for exclusively breastfed babies for less nipple confusion. My first daughter was only breastfed and she used a pacifier just fine!!

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Theresa - posted on 01/14/2010

36

23

8

Hey there, both my boys were breastfed and I had the same problem, particularly with the firstborn, Nathan. I was constantly feeding him, and unlike yourself for a while I did stay cooped up in the house going stir crazy because he was constantly wanting fed, and like yourself he would just nod off - he wasn't eating at all.

How I got it sorted, and it was a long process I'm afraid, was to get him attached to something else for comfort. My midwife explained to me that he was only suckling for comfort so I had to substitute that for something else. So I started putting a teddy in bed with him, just to get him used to the smell etc. Then I had to stop him falling asleep during a feed. To do this I would feed him, then change his nappy and feed him a bit more but not let him fall asleep. That way I knew he had definately fed enough so was not hungry. (If in any doubt it doesn't hurt to express a bottle and check what he is eating by the way, did that a few times as well). Then I used the Teddy to get him to sleep. Now I'm not going to lie, it was hard and I had a few disturbed nights and you need A LOT of patience, but my god it is so worth it.

Nathan also refused a sooky (Dummy, Pacifiier) until he was actually 6 months old. By that time I was doing controlled crying with him, and the only sooky I could get him to take were the cheapo ones from Supersave. I bought all kinds of ridiculously expensive pacifiers for him, even paying as much as £10 for one that was supposed to feel like being breastfed and he refused them all, he still uses his cheapo ones to this day, and of course he carries Teddy with him everywhere.

It is something to think about though because now he won't let go of his Sooky and he needs it to sleep as well as his Teddy, his elephant and a copy of Ice Age 3.

I think another important thing to mention is that you should not feel bad if your child gets upset because you will not offer her the breast every time she cries, you are not being a bad person for denying it you are simply setting boundaries that your daughter needs, otherwise you will find yourself getting frustrated with the breastfeeding and that's not good. After all you are doing it in the first place because it is best for your daughter :D

Theresa - posted on 01/14/2010

1

0

0

It sounds like she's got you!! Babies are very smart we totally underestimate them and its ok to let them cry, I have a 4 yr old and 12mth old twins, so there is someone who always needs attention. If you know she's been fed and full but is crying just to comfort nurse, let her cry for 10 min (which seems like hours while its going on) but she will learn to self sooth and you will have some sanity. BTW I breastfed my oldest until he was 1yr and he never wanted a pacifier after 4mths old and my twins were fed until 41/2 mths old my daughter only uses the soothie brand bink for bed time. Hope this helps.

Najiyah - posted on 08/19/2012

1

0

0

My daughter is about to be 3months and she finally took the pacifier... Its crazy cause when she was in the hospital she always would come back from seeing the dr with a pacifier in her mouth the moment i took her home she refused to take one ugh! But just the other night i tried sugar water and at first she was fussy cause sbe wanted it but couldnt figure how to keep it in her mouth but as soon as she got the hang of it she went to town lol tell ya what i got to arrange my whole living room that night and o yeah now she just takes them perfectly GOOD LUCK!

User - posted on 01/14/2010

629

0

83

I would agree with letting her suck your finger. Another option is to carry her in a sling so you can feed her and keep your hands free. There's nothing wrong with her getting comfort from your breast. There's more to breastfeeding than nutritional input.
I would say you don't need to give her any water or other food, particularly on a dummy. This will affect your supply and give her a sweet tooth.

Also its great that she's going so long at night, be thankful for that!

Genevieve - posted on 01/14/2010

3

33

0

Hi. All my children were breastfed and all sucked a dummy/pacifier (NUK). The best way to get her to suck it is to ensure that when you put it in her mouth that you put it in touch the roof of her mout because this stimulates the sucking reflex. She will then suck it for a bit and probably spit it out but just persevere. It does make your life alot easier. My older 2 children stopped sucking their by 2 and a half (at age 18months) the dummy was used only for sleeping. Hope this helps :)

This conversation has been closed to further comments

16 Comments

View replies by

Tanya - posted on 01/14/2010

12

0

2

Keep trying different pacificiers as already suggested, I hope that eventually she will find one she prefers. Keep us posted.

Courtney - posted on 01/14/2010

147

18

11

Thanks everyone for the advise! It is amazing how different children are...even within my little family! My first daughter loved the NUK paci's, so I just assumed it was because the similarity to my breast. I will go out and buy some different paci's to see if there is on that my youngest prefers. Thank you all for the helpfuk advise!! :)

[deleted account]

On my youngest son he had a phase when he was about 6 weeks of wanting to be feeding constantly he wouldnt take a dummy/pacifier but i perservered and just held it gently by his mouth until he got the idea he had to suck it. That was the problem with him that he couldnt work out how to keep it in his mouth and would get frustrated and spit it out. He caught on in the end and had a dummy until he was about 8 months old when he swapped it for a blankie. I would recommend you carry on trying with the dummy dont let them suck their thumb if you can because my second child did that and when they go to school they tend to fetch every illness going home and its a nightmare trying to get them to stop doing it when they are older. My son is 9 and hes only just stopped.

Hailey - posted on 01/14/2010

12

48

1

If you keep offering your child a paci then they will eventually take it. Paci's are great things and lots of people complain that it is hard for the child to let go of it later, but usually they give it up on their own. I have 3 kids and it was easy to do for the most part, especially with my first daughter. You have to make time for yourself. If you always give into the baby, especially if you know they just want to suckle long enough to fall asleep, then they are going to learn that they can do it everytime and get away with it. You are NOT neglecting your child. If she isn't hungry then you shouldn't put her on your breast. We tried putting our daughters finger in her mouth and also tried many different paci's. She finally found one she loved. You are the mom though and it is your decision of what you do. Good Luck and Go out and have some fun. You deserve it!!

Aicha - posted on 01/14/2010

1,533

320

350

I couldn't get any of my 3 children to take a pacifier and I have tried to get my youngest she is 3 months old but now I give up she has found her thumb and sucks on it like crazy

Ashy - posted on 01/14/2010

1

26

0

My son uses MAM pacifiers he hates any other kind, he was also being breastfed, but when he would want to suckle but not eat i would just gently tickle his cheek while holding the pacifier in his mouth and within second he would take it, still works today.

i also ONLY use silicone nipples. he doesn't like any other kind. and a lot of the times he wont take it only because he doesn't want it, i have made it a routine to only give it to him when we are out, at nap time & when we lay him down for the night but just about every morning i go in his pacifier is tossed on the other side of his bed, but during the day he isn't really allowed to have it

Jessica - posted on 01/14/2010

52

8

4

mine does exactly the same, will not take a dummy, always at the boob! i give her my finger to suck, upside down (nail to tongue) which she loves, its a pain, but if i do that for a few mins she drops back off, and it means i dont have to whip out the boob whenever she needs sucking comfort! Works a treat, and my lactation consultant said to try and help her find her own had/fingers to suck on, which works if shes calm enough, otherwise her arms are jerking everywhere and she cant keep a hold, she has yet to learn her hands are attached to her! :)

Daniela - posted on 01/13/2010

4

14

0

DO NOT GIVE HER A DUMMY! You will only have to try and get her off it later( my current mistake) Try taking some purified water out with you in a sterilized bottle and give her that instead of your breast.

Darylann - posted on 01/13/2010

105

7

4

That is extreme, my son has done that too, just not ALL the time! You should try more than just one kind of pacifier. I tried a few different kinds with my son when he was first born, and he definately prefers MAM pacifiers over the others. They come in different sizes that grow with your baby, and I really like them too. By the way I exclusively breastfeed my son also!

Letitia - posted on 01/13/2010

31

27

4

i had the same problem with my daughter, i am also only breastfeeding.i tried everything from different dummies to even using glycine. (check spelling) in the end i tried the bulb dummie the cheapes one on the market and it worked. tell me how you get on. if you do use the glycine only use a little bit.

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms