how to keep 3 yr old twin boys in their beds without getting up and down 500 times

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Suzanne - posted on 10/17/2012

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becareful about the locking kids in, my grandmother used to get locked in a room as a kid, and when she was an old woman she used to have horrid nightmares, memories of being locked in.

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Sandra - posted on 10/17/2012

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Wow great response thank you so much for everyones wisdom .... it was actually a little comforting that i am not the only one going through these frustrating times !!!! lol well tonight i told them One Hug , One Kiss and bed time no up and down and did not entertain if one got out of bed i ignored him and he and his brother are asleep in their beds thank you God !!!!

The witching hour only started at 5pm today !!!!

Shelby - posted on 10/17/2012

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Best advice is to separate them if you can. One of our twins was keeping the other up and they goofed around. Life was a whole new world when their playmate wasn't in the room with them. I also got a couple of small touch lights (2 for $6.50 at Target-Energizer) so they each have one attached to their headboard if they want to read or just be able to see at night. Deal is if they get out of bed the books and light are gone. They also have a noise machine w/projector (also at Target) to block out outside noise and super dark curtains. Still have some setbacks, but it is TONS better.

Debbie - posted on 10/17/2012

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Persistence... Every time you give in starts you back at square one. Routine is essential... We brushed teeth, toilet then read a story before putting a lullaby CD on so it was barely audible, tucked in, given favourite bear, kiss goodnight, lights out and leave. If child gets up straight back to bed, no talking. We also used a behaviour chart. Getting up once only - small reward Not getting up at all - give reward such as watching cartoons during breakfast was given ... Rewards depend on child's likes etc. A week of not getting out of bed meant a trip to the toy shop for something under $10. Two weeks for our little one meant a Ben10 toy. Three weeks.... Problem solved, no looking back.



A three year old is able to understand how actions have consequences so a progressive reward chart like above is appropriate ....



PLEASE NEVER LOCK A CHILD IN IT IS DANGEROUS AND WILL AFFECT THEM EMOTIONALLY, however a small gate is a good idea unless your child needs to use the bathroom in the middle of the night.



AGAIN PERSISTENCE And ROUTINE is the key... It is hard work especially with twins but in the long run it is the key. Both our kids are now 12 hour plus sleepers





GOOD LUCK X



Just a note... As child gets older, learning CD's such as number and alphabet songs, times tables etc played while a child is going to sleep help them learn the concepts being taught... Some children even learn to grasp a foreign language like this....

Khadijah - posted on 10/17/2012

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I totally feel your pain. I have 3yr old twin girls who

are constantly getting out of bed, playing, getting in

disagreements with one another,leaving thier room, etc.

I put them to bed at 9pm, but most nights I dont get to sleep

until after midnight because I have to keep jumping up. Its

so exhausting but all I can do is pray this phase ends soon and

VERY SOON!!!!

User - posted on 10/17/2012

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I don't have a magic answer but I just wanted to say we are going through the same thing at 3.5 yrs old and I would imagine that with twins it's so much harder! Are you able to talk with them about why they don't want to stay in bed? My son is now afraid of the dark so that's one reason ~ he sleeps with 3 nightlights and a lamp on every night! But he's also just into making excuses about why he needs to get up....maybe if they can "talk" to you about WHY...you can start to make appropriate changes to their routine?? I also started taking priviledges away every time he got out of bed. I started small....Good luck!! I feel your pain and hope it all gets better soon! :)

User - posted on 10/17/2012

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Play music that is calming, instrumental, give them a toy, close curtains to lower light. Read a book for 15 min. Take them to a park in the morning for three hours to get them tired

Rachel - posted on 10/17/2012

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i used put my daughter bed shed cry id leave her for 10 mins go tell her bedtime if she got out keep putting her back in no eye contact or mummy talking must be done just put back to bed everytime gets up took about a week to do was up putting her in bed let her cry for nights but it workted it broke my heart her crying to sleep but now she sleeps 7-30 to 7-30am no wake ups if does wake she settles herself back of its hard but it will pay of gud luck

Amanda - posted on 10/17/2012

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With my son, we used a soothing sounds machine, and it played ocean sounds all night, so if he woke up, it was still playing and made it easier for him to go back to sleep. I also made the rule that if he got out of bed more than twice, he would get a spanking. I also put a nightlight in the bathroom and taught him to just get up and go to the bathroom if he needed and get back in the bed. I only had to spank him twice, and we've had great nights ever since. Good luck!

Jaime - posted on 10/17/2012

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I also have twin 5 yo boys and have great difficulty getting them to stay in bed. In previous years we had a child proof handle on the inside I'd their door, which they could open, but disnt. Then, last summer, we had an electrical fire that started in their room first thing in the morning. They, thank the lord, were able to open their door. God knows I don't know how I would live if something terrible had happened. But, now we are back to square one with them, and they never go to sleep!! It's exhausting but I'm thankful for a wonderful husband. My only advice is to keep trying. Eventually it will happen. It may take years, but in the end, they are worth it.

Heather - posted on 10/17/2012

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Sandra I have the same exact problem. My twin boys will be 3 in a few weeks and they are like night and day. One of them will sleep through the night no problem or get up and stay up for 2-3 hours! The other will sleep through the night IF he sleeps with me. This is exhausting. We get up a million times a night for one reason or another. I have debating locking mine in but I don't know if I can survive that. We did the baby gate, they can climb over it. I almost always give in because we're so sleepy and they crawl in bed with us. I know they say the best thing is to lay them down and just keep putting them back in bed but man...I go to work and school. There is NOT enough coffee in the world...

Evie - posted on 10/17/2012

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Well I don't have twins but I could write a book on keeping a toddler in her bed. I HAD an angel daughter who once put to bed in her cot, would happily lie there in the dark with her door closed and stay very quiet until sleep came. It was bliss, then at 26 months we slowly moved her into a bed and the devil in her awoke. We had 6 weeks of hell and I wish now I had done what I did in the end at the beginning. At first she wouldn't let me leave the room until she was asleep and this could take hours as if I tried to leave she would jump up and screech 'don't run away', then she would be up and down the hall to me all evening/night. I started by putting a portacot into her room out of desparation and putting her into it at night after trying to settle her back to bed a million times (this was a bad move as she then wanted that and wasn't getting quality sleep in the small space and was ratty during the day). She eventually learned how to jump out of this portacot. We then got an idea from a friend about letting her lie in the bed listening to nursery rhymes on a little stereo, this was great for bedtime, she fell asleep listening to them but would wake later and kick off that they had stopped playing and I'd have to put them on again, after a week or two this was draining as she would stay awake in the night singing away, so we stopped this. Then my husband went away on business for a week and I had the worst week ever, I was so sleep deprived and desparate when he returned (I'm pregnant by the way so that didn't help). She would wander the house at night, raid the pantry and once even went out onto the back deck. She cried, kicked, screamed and fought me all that week, I was at breaking point. I said to hubbie I can't do this anymore, I'm at my wits end and we were about to put the cot back in her room when we thought, what about a gate on the doorway to stop her visiting us in the night, this was great but she still would wake and stand there screaming for us and we'd have to go to her. THEN we did what I swore I would never do, we put a lock on the bedroom door, so she goes to bed now and we close the gate but leave the door open, she no longer wants her nursery rhymes so she just lies there sometimes with a book and eventually sleeps, then once asleep we tuck her in properly and close and lock the door. It's magic again, my angel is back. Now don't think this was an easy end, for the first 6 days of locking the door after she went to sleep she would wake and kick the door and cry (first night for 2.5 hours with visits from us, but slowly as the days went by the time at the door crying got less and less until eventually she slept through the night again). We're all very happy in this house again, we really were at our wits end though, I cried so much myself over the whole situation, especially when we locked her in, I would have to go into the shower (crying) to stop myself from opening the door and hugging her and staying with her. Our daughter now goes to bed between 6.30pm & 7pm, is asleep within a max of 20 - 30 minutes and sleeps about 13 or 14 hours overnight. Daynaps however don't happen anymore and I'm not about to fight that one, I'm just happy nighttime is sorted and we are ready for our new arrival in 5 weeks time. I hope you can pull some things out of what we've done and strike up a balance for yourselves, I'm sure it's harder with twins as they will encourage each other to be naughty at bedtime and you have a double battle on your hands. People said to me 'don't worry it will pass it's just a faze', I thought it never would but it did, I'm here and I survived, but I will NEVER forget that 6 weeks from hell. Good luck, I'll be thinking of you tonight x

Fann_julia - posted on 10/17/2012

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Its not a end-all answer but it has helped reduce the number of trip in and out of bed and his bedroom. I tell my 3yr old that he doesn't have to sleep the moment I'm done reading a story, but he has to stay in bed. He can bring a couple of cars/toys and read his books, but he has to stay in bed and be quiet. Its less traumatic for my high maintenance son than the locking of the door, which I've done and he's still terribly afraid of closed doors. Good luck!

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