how to stay with your partner when you aren't in love with them.

Clarise - posted on 04/29/2014 ( 4 moms have responded )

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I love my fiancé but I am not in love with him. When I was pregnant he was always angry just because we didn't have our own place and that I went to live with my sister and he went to live with his dad. We live together now but I really dislike the things he does like not wash his hands after using the bathroom and when he gets home from work he doesn't take a shower. He has really bad oder. When I go use the bathroom and she is crying he is still laying in bed asleep. I understand he works nights: 10pm to 6am, but at least help a little. He does talk too much at times and he reaps things that uI already said. Its just annoying. I am still in recovery and I am just not happy anymore.
What should I do.

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Desire - posted on 04/29/2014

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Talk to him about your concerns first. Maybe he doesn't realize the annoyances he's causing. Give him a chance to change those things and if after a few weeks he is still acting the same, let him go. Chances are hes already stuck in his obnoxious ways. A man should be supportive and helpful in everything you do as a family or as a person. Sometimes these things can be taught while other times you wish his mother would have raised him to shower when you smell, budget money or help with a crying baby.

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Clarise - posted on 04/29/2014

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Sometimes its hard to talk to him without him snapping on me and start hating himself and hitting himself in the head and that's not how I want my daughter to be like.

Ariana - posted on 04/29/2014

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Is there a way for you to talk to him about some of these issues in a calm manner? Just to sit down and talk about it without things getting super heated.

Talking it out might help but if you're having issues with that could you two go to a couples councilor who can help you work things out? It sounds like he's just doing things that annoy you and maybe a lack of excitement rather than a major problem with him.

Especially things like showering after he gets back from work, that's pretty simple and there's no real reason he shouldn't have a quick shower. Have you tried to ask him about that? What's happened if you did?

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