How to stop yelling???

Josephine - posted on 09/22/2016 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I am new at this. I hope every mother on here is having a fabulous day :). I do have one question, hopefully someone can help me, I don't do this all the time, only in times when my daughter doesn't listen to me. I start to yell at her and she start's to cry and then she tells me that everybody hates her. My heart will hurt so much, when she says that. My respond to her is no one hates, you have so many wonderful family and friends in your world, they are surrounding you with love. I will apologize to her for yelling in which, I tell her, mommy is trying to learn just like you :).
But how do control the yelling, when I see her face and she start's to cry, I look at her and say, what did I just do? Any suggestions?

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Jodi - posted on 09/22/2016

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I agree with Sarah. Alternatively, you can ask your child to go to her room - this also gives you time to calm down. Once you are calm, it is much easier to manage the situation. Sometimes, time out isn't just for the child, it can be for both of you.

Sarah - posted on 09/22/2016

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You step away from the situation. Go into the bathroom, shut the door, count to 10. Then figure out how you will approach the situation without yelling. Are you getting down on her level when you talk to her? Are you requiring eye contact from her? If you are doing these things then does she need a consequence? Maybe a time out for her is needed? There is no need to yell, but at the same time you can't ignore the behavior. Allow her to make the choice if she is going to obey or not, but then if she does not obey then follow through with the consequence. Remember parenting is about teaching not forcing. If you force the only thing you teach is fear. If you teach you then teach that in life she will have choices to make with those choices come good and bad consequences.

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