Husband and Baby names

Lisa - posted on 10/17/2011 ( 26 moms have responded )

162

24

26

We found out last Thursday that the new baby(due 2/25/12) will be a boy and I really want to pick out a name for him! My husband is not really interested, I feel like I'm pulling his teeth when I bring names up.
Thing is I feel like it will improve my bonding with the baby if I know what to call him. My husband thinks we should wait until the baby is born before we name him because he wants a name that "fits"
btw this is our 3rd. We didn't name the first (boy) until he was born but the 2nd (girl) was named right after we found out she was a girl.

Mostly just venting here

MOST HELPFUL POSTS

Tinker1987 - posted on 10/21/2011

1,144

5

10

@Nicole that is awful advice.without the sperm,the baby couldnt be concieved carried and so forth. making a baby takes two and the father has every right too be apart of the name process.yes it can be a stubborn battle and couples can argue about names for 9 months but in the end they find the perfect name they both like. before i found out i was having a boy we talked girl names and we disagreed on all of them. i was ready to pull myhair out,but i would never go ahead and name my child withouth is consent!

Sherri - posted on 10/21/2011

9,593

15

391

Wow I can't imagine a marriage or relationship with those standards Nicole.

Just because he can't actually carry a child doesn't give the father any less rights in helping to name or care for said child.

I wouldn't be married if my husband and I weren't a team. So sad to see you think that way.

Nicole - posted on 10/20/2011

2

9

0

When your husband conceives and carries a child then gives birth to it he can have a say. Name your child, Mom.

Jessica - posted on 10/18/2011

5

20

0

i think that there is a connection with the child at birth but i don't think that their is any difference in those children that learned their names before after they are born

Krista - posted on 10/18/2011

12,562

16

845

It could be worse. I've seen more than a few threads on here where the husband is insisting that their kid get some really heinous family name.

Kate's suggestion is good, though. Pick out a few names. If one feels better than the other, you can go with it for now. When the baby's born, if the name just doesn't "fit", then at least you have a few backup names, instead of having to start back at square one.

26 Comments

View replies by

Cassandra - posted on 10/22/2011

74

97

7

I'm due feb.13 2012 and this is my second which is another boy. Still trying to figure out a boy name

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/21/2011

6,435

12

72

Nicole, both parents should be able to have some say in the names. I just ended up having a better choice of a name for my older daughter (her father wanted to name our daughter LORNA) so her name is Abigail. My husband couldn't think of a good girl name for our baby either so I chose Lillian.



As for my SIL, she just told my brother he got to pick the last name, but that was as a joke.



When both parents are present I believe it's important for both of them to have a say (which is why I really want to say 'no' to Harvey as a first name) so they both feel involved.



I may be bossy, but I can't imagine telling my husband that because he's not carrying the baby he can't help name him or her. That's just selfish. You wouldn't even have a baby if it weren't for the baby's father.

Sandra - posted on 10/19/2011

10

14

0

Its not just your partner so I dont worry just pick names you like and when your son is born then your sorted. Men tend not to believe its real which I don't understand to tell you the truth until the baby is in their arms.

Julie - posted on 10/19/2011

14

5

0

Try picking out a really heinous name and talk about the baby and call him that. When your husband asks about what you are doing just tell him you like the name and are just "trying it out" if that doesn't get him to start thinking about names I don't know what to tell you. Have some fun with him.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/19/2011

6,435

12

72

LOL Rebecca, I'm suprised my husband hasn't suggested that... or Master Cheif from Halo. Now that just makes me glad that he's suggesting Harvey Gerald if we have a boy.

Jessica, what do you mean about already replied?

Rebecca - posted on 10/19/2011

2

18

0

I understand you wanting a name to bond with, having one picked out does help! I called my son 'the peanut' until we picked a name, my husband was adamant about naming him Optimus-yes, the Transformer!- and would not budge for the longest time....he eventually came to his senses and we chose Dominic Edward which is much better :) Do what you want to do, you are the one carrying him! Good luck!

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/18/2011

6,435

12

72

My brother and SIL bonded just fine with their son even though he was called Bubba and junior up to the week before he was born.

Rhonda - posted on 10/18/2011

5

0

0

I didn't even know what I was having until the day he was born! lol My friend called him "Bubby" before he was I born. I called him "Peanut" (I wasn't as convinced that he was a boy as she was! lol) Eventually his dad and I picked names of very special people who left this earth too soon to name him....though sometimes I still call him Peanut! :-D

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/18/2011

6,435

12

72

Sherri, James is my nephew's middle name too. It was also my brother's name before my parents adopted him and renamed him John. My nephew's first name is Jacob and so much for no nicknames because the baby has one, JJ.

I always called my girls by their nicknames when I was pregnant with them. So did a friend of mine, she wouldn't let anyone refer to the baby as 'baby' after she found out she was having a girl we had to refer to the unborn as Alicia.

Stifler's - posted on 10/18/2011

15,141

154

604

We didn't choose Logan until the last minute. I chose Renae already in case he was a girl so we just went with that for the second baby.

Sherri - posted on 10/18/2011

9,593

15

391

I could never carry a child and not have a name prepicked. I believe in calling my child by their name in the womb though. I already have 3 boys and am pregnant with my 4th boy due Feb. 21, 2012 and he has been named for the last 3mo's or so. His name is Bentley James.

Nicola - posted on 10/18/2011

190

21

7

my friend and her husband had an inside names that they called him when talking about h8im before he was born and then a few outside names so they could pick the one that fitted he still occasionally gets called Pod which was his inside name so i guess its moved to nicname territory now.

LaLasha - posted on 10/18/2011

147

31

4

I'm having my first boy we are due the same week you and I we have already named him and it has helped me bond with him. I wanted a third girl really really really bad that should have been my first clue I was having a boy,but calling my son by his name has really helped cement a bond for me and accept that he is intact not a girl and that's ok.

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/18/2011

6,435

12

72

Lisa my brother and SIL couldn't think of a name for their baby boy either. Well more accurately they couldn't pick a first name. My brother didn't want one that could be a nick name or another John (his name is John, our dad's name is John, we have a cousin Jonathan and our grandfather's name was John) They didn't agree on a name until a WEEK before their son was born!

Leandra - posted on 10/18/2011

111

36

21

My husband was the same way.. he felt he had lots of time. Do what you want to do. Make a list of names you like and then give it to him to look through. what ever comments he says make adjustments to your list and do it again. For me it helped to get him to look at the list some by saying how much I really like a certain name that he was not the biggest fan of. Good luck and try to have fun with it

Emilie - posted on 10/18/2011

916

35

143

If he dosen't want to pick out a name then you pick out a few, and when he is born pick out the one that works the best. My cousin is pregnant right now with twin girls and until she found out they were girls she called them thing 1 and thing 2. I have another friend that just had a baby and until she was born they called her the little blueberry.

Stifler's - posted on 10/17/2011

15,141

154

604

My husband didn't really care with our second kid either. It was all new with the first by the second he was like whatever you want babe

♥♪Megan♫♥ - posted on 10/17/2011

6,435

12

72

My husband just couldn't think of any girl names we both liked- little did I know that naming my baby by myself meant that if we have a boy next his name will be Harvey Gerald. But even though my DH never helped come up with a name he still bonded with Lilli. He's bonded with my older daughter too.

Some guys just aren't much for naming something unless it's a vehicle

Katherine - posted on 10/17/2011

65,420

232

5193

Well if he wants a name that fits, why don't you two pick out a few and then when he comes, you can figure out what to name him?

Join Circle of Moms

Sign up for Circle of Moms and be a part of this community! Membership is just one click away.

Join Circle of Moms