Lucy - posted on 02/28/2016 ( 8 moms have responded )
So I have some trust issues with my husband, I know he would never cheat on me. But I'm super insecure and have been my entire life, it's a bad thing to be! I'm trying to change and I'm going to take classes to try and help. All my previous bf's have cheated on me and always left me to go to the strip clubs or " Bachelor parties" my ex fingered a stripper than came home and made me smell his finger! 😡🔫 So about 11 months ago I went through my husbands phone and saw some screen shots of very attractive fake half naked women in his recently deleted pictures. They were screen shots of escorts and strippers on backpages.com I instantly thought he was ordering these women for a one night stand and this was his answer.. They are for my cousin, he's a swinger and wants to find a hot single girl to do it with him and his wife. So I believed him. I'm also pissed because I'm a 5foot black hair, 115 pounds, kinda punk rock type of girl with tattoos and piercings and all nature. No fake boobs, Botox, bleach blonde long hair, twig skinny and tall, lip injections ect.. Well that's my husbands type, that's his x wife, the pictures of girls on his phone. So yes that made me feel like I'm not his type. I should be happy that he's with me but I'm not, I see him check out other women, watch porn all the time, always googling hot girls with fake boobs. I always look through his phone and I know that's so wrong, I look through it to make myself feel better. When I don't find anything I feel 10 pounds lighter and not stressing. Well two days ago I feel his phone under my head and he's sleeping so I decided to go through it again. :/ I find more screen shots of other hot young women in his recently deleted pictures. So yes he hid it from me. I figured it was for his cousin again, but last time that happened I cried and was super upset about it and he said he wouldn't do that again. I told him he's not his cousins pimp and hook up for other women! So this time I ask him about it and he says it's none of my god damn business and I'm not his mother! Exactly I'm not his mother I'm his wife and best friend. He should be able to tell me anything. I get he's a man and has his guy talk and what not but these strippera and escorts were getting to me. Don't get me wrong I have nothing against those women! I have plenty of friends who are strippers and escorts! So we fight and fight about this and he won't tell me why he has these pictures and he obviously didn't want me to see. It's all my fault that I went through his phone. So if he cheats on me and I go through his phone then it's my own fault that I found out lol so if I don't go through it, it's like nothing has happened. So he tells me that his co workers friend is having a bachelor party and he wants to go. For one he doesn't know the guy for two he tells me he doesn't like strippers and he wouldn't let me have a bachelorette party and he didn't want a bachelor party with either marriage. He says it's just for people to fuck or mess around one last time before they are tied down. Witch doesn't make sense to me either, I don't really agree with those parties but that's just me. So the pictures I found makes me think either he's trying to look like the "cool" guy who has all the hook ups and knows hot girls or two that he secretly wants to go and meet these girls. I'm totally fine with my husband going to bars and concerts and whatever else but when it comes to him paying other women to take off their clothes or gawking over other naked women really upsets me. I feel like he's bored of me and gets off looking at other women. I don't want my husband to spend time with other naked women. I feel when you get married that you guys should have eyes only for each other. I told him if he wants to go that bad then he can go single. If I let him go once then it will become more than a once. We have been fighting crazy lately over everything and divorce is already on the table. I'm more disappointed he couldn't come to me about this, he knows I know girls. He says he doesn't have to tell me anything that he talks with his guys about. He thinks I don't trust him to go, that's not the case I do trust him that he won't fuck another girl but I doubt if a hot naked girl climed on top of him to give him a lap dance he wouldn't push her off. I am a bartender and he freaked when I started working here because he doesn't want guys hitting on me. I recently asked him if I could cocktail at the strip club to make more money and he said fuck no or we are done... So why is it okay for him to go the chiller party but I'm not allowed to work at a strip club?? I am mad he hides these things from me! I found out he watched porn everyday for two weeks! I told him I'd watch it with him but he says that's wierd. Plus I never tell my husband No, I put out anytime he asks!! I give him head anytime he asks! I'm like his own personal porn star! He even asked if a girl could join us.. Witch again I'm not really okay with. I feel like he wants to have his cake and eat it too. I feel bad that I'm a controlling insecure wife, he does deserve to be a man and do what he wants. He should be single if he wants that life style. I'm more mad he hid this again, it's the second time this has happened! He lied and hid this from me. What else could he be lying about... I also found in his search history sexy unicorn lol and a chive dating website, he said he used to have it and he got a email saying they miss him so he went in and deleted it. It's just one thing after another with him. Am I in the wrong for not wanting my husband to be around naked women? And escorts?!