Husbands ex wife making our life impossible!

Misty - posted on 08/26/2016 ( 4 moms have responded )

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My husband and I have been together for 5 years. He has 2 children from a previous marriage and I also have 2 children from a previous marriage. My husband and I have a wonderful relationship! we also have a good relationship with my ex and his new wife. Our ONLY struggle is that his ex-wife does everything she can to cause trouble for us, and hurt to my husband. We have been to counselors on how to deal with her and what they have told us is that we are dealing with a narcissistic sociopath, and after looking up the definition, she fits the bill completely. We have been together for five years and there has not been one month that has gone by that she hasn't caused problems between him and his kids or tried to drain him financially. She tells his children lies and manipulates them into thinking he is the bad guy. She has even enrolled the kids in t-19 and submitted fake receipts to my husband to collect money from him ( because he was responsible for all medical bills) after the state paid for her children's dental exams! Most recently we were allowed one week vacation with his children that she had agreed to. We booked a trip out of the country. Now, 5 months later, his ex-wife has gone back on allowing us this time and not allowing his kids to come. There is NO good reason for her to go back on this and it breaks my heart for his kids that WANT to come along!! We are so sad and at our wits end!!what do we do?!

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Dove - posted on 08/26/2016

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I agree w/ Jodi. While it would be nice to have an extra vacation... you know she is likely to go back on the agreement, so just stick to the court orders. If something REALLY important is coming up in the future that you would like the kids to come along on... consider getting a court order pertaining directly to that.

It is great when both bio parents can get along and work these things out together, but it is often not possible due to particular circumstances. If you just stick to the court orders there will be no surprises and there will be legal repercussions if she goes against it.

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Jodi - posted on 08/26/2016

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There is very little you CAN do. If you know she is like this, then you need to just stick to the court orders by the letter. Don't expect that she won't rip the rug out from under your feet with your plans if you plan it outside court ordered time. And passports? you should have made sure you had the signatures for the passports before you booked. I'm not saying you are in the wrong, but if you know what she is like, don't push the boundaries, ever. Unless the agreement is approved int he court, it isn't an enforceable agreement.

Misty - posted on 08/26/2016

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He has a court order for regular visitation. This vacation is time outside of their regular visitation schedule in return for him giving her extra time in order for her to take the kids on a trip. She got what she wanted, and now that it is his time, she is reneging on the agreement. And without the kids' passports and her consent we cannot take them on the trip we have booked and payed for.

As far as the bills go we were able to prove they were fake with help from the dental office and did not pay. These are just examples of what we are up against on a weekly basis. It is exhausting. I guess what I am looking for is someone to give advise on how to deal with this, or someone that had been through something similar...

Jodi - posted on 08/26/2016

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Why does your husband not have a court order for his time with the children? Surely he has court orders for his visitation that she can't actually interfere with?

And if you know the receipts are fake, and can prove it, then don't pay.

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