i am 14 and pregnant.. what should i do
Jamie - posted on 02/12/2013
I know everyone's situtation is different but my cousin had her daughter at the age of fifteen. Although she is very immature for her age it is not what she excepted it to be. Her baby's father and her had been together for a couple years and he was there through her whole pregnancy and after the first two months or so he hasnt been invovled at all. My cousins daughter is turning two and he hasnt seen her in over a year. He also doesn't pay his child support, they recently had a court date. My cousin works really hard to take care of her, she lives with my grandma and has alot of support from her but she is graduating a year early and has a part time job. Thus, she has less time to spend with her daughter. Like i said I know every situtation is different but you have alot of growing up and understanding of the full situtation before you actually understand that having a baby is not like playing house.
You said in one post that your mom kicked you out and you are going to go live with your dad now you're saying that your mom died when you were five, which is it? I get that you feel like you have to grow up and be responsible and raise this baby but maybe the responsible choice here is adoption. You are 14, there is a good chance that some or even all of your friends will stop hanging out with you.
It is going to be really hard if you decide to keep the baby, given your age I feel like it will be even harder on you. I'm 25 and I'm going to be honest here thought I was ready to be a mom but I so wasn't. I can't imagine having a kid at your age. I truly think you need to really consider your options here.
Amber - posted on 01/27/2013
The babys daddy is 16 and yes he is, he has been the best thing... yhur right we arent ggeting married that would be silly but we are together and are both happy ,, things happen for a reason god wouldnt hand me something i couldnt handle
Ev - posted on 01/24/2013
Ashley~~Marriage because of the child is not the answer. At fourteen, this girl has enough on her plate with a baby coming. She and the boy or man who is the father are not going to last long because it will be for the baby mostly. Marriages like that do not last. I know because I have seen it.
The real question I have is this and should be the one asked more than if he is planning to marry this girl: Is the father of the baby going to do his part in support of the child? or Is he going to be agreeable to letting the child be adopted?
Jodi - posted on 01/17/2013
How can you drive? You're not even old enough to have a licence!!! And I know it is illegal to hire a 14 year old where I live - not sure what the child labour laws are in other areas.
You are going to have to talk to a responsible adult (either your my or your dad) about this, because you are going to need support if you want to be able to finish school.
Amber - posted on 01/17/2013
Im not a wild person, and i drive, i also have a job, it doesnt bring alot but hey its money. I understand the fact the most people Dont believe in it. But i layed down for a guy and i have to accept the reresponthat comes with itth. Im not haven an abortion, and my mom is gonna kick me out nd send me to my dads .
Jennifer - posted on 01/17/2013
I had twins when i was 23 and being a single mom it was rough. I had my family to support me and help me but even so it was still hard. I wasnt trying to be mean yesterday, was just talking from a mommy point of view. I would make my daughter keep her baby if she was to get pregnant that young. I wouldnt be happy she was pregnant but i wouldnt make her have an abortion or give the baby up for adoption. My daughter is 7 years old now and once she starts asking questions about sex, Imma do my best to drill it in her head that she needs to use protection unless shes ready for a big responsibility.
Ariana - posted on 01/16/2013
I think there are three options here that you need to consider. Abortion, adoption and keeping it.
I am not against abortion but I know some people cannot go through with it or are against it but it is still an option.
Otherwise you could also give the child up for adoption. You have to consider are you the best place for this child? How will you raise it? Is your life going to be fulfilled with this child? Will you regret this decision? Are your parents going to end up taking care of the baby instead of you?
If you decide to keep this child you are giving up your opportunities as a teenager or young adult. You will not be able to hang out with your friends the way you do now, you will not get to go partying like them, or do the same things as them. Your chances of passing high school or going to college/university lesson, and if you do manage to do it it is so much harder (I know). You are giving up your opportunities to be carefree and young.
I'm not saying you shouldn't have a child as a teenager, I did, but even then I was 17, I'd managed to go to parties and hang out, you're 14, you can't even drive. It isn't some easy decision, your life is not going to be the same as before. People will not care about you as much as they do this child, this child will be the most important thing. If you make mistakes you can lose this child, I'm not saying you will/would I'm just telling you right now when you give birth to a child your first priority is them and your second priority is you. If you cannot handle the responsibility of that there is no shame in giving the child up for adoption.
Talk to your parents and talk to a social worker/pregnancy councellor. You need to figure out realistically what is the best decision for you and for this baby if you decide to have it.
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