i am a single mother of a 10 year old boy, his father left us when he was 2 and we havent seen him since, i was in an abusive relationship since then for 8 years, not physical but mentally and emotionally, so was my son, were free now about 3 months but i now am facing the prob;lem of my sons lying...he lies all the time, i have on a few occasions told him to lie for us due to my relationship but now its come back to haunt me, this is not once in a while its almost daily, and even when he is caught he still tries to lie out of that one, our lies were only simple, like what we ate for lunch or if i bought him something new, i just told him not to tell that i did it or that we ate home for lunch, did i create this avalanche of lies, how do i correct this, u know i feel bad cuz i have done it so i am in a real hard place right now HELP!!!


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Yeah, I recommend counseling for both of you. I'm glad you got out of the abusive situation, but that life is pretty much all your son knows now and it will take time and help for you to both heal and learn otherwise.

I_landgirl67 - posted on 12/07/2011




thank you Erin, u are so right in your analogy of the two reasonings of his lying, i am thinking of theraphy because at this point he is so confused...and i too!

Erin - posted on 12/07/2011




Yes, you did cause this, but unfortunately, I don't think you can undo it alone. Your son does not understand the difference between a lie to protect you from abuse and a lie to avoid a punishment. To his mind, they are probably the same thing. Talk to his school counselor and his doctor and get a recommendation of a good child psychologist or counselor to help him learn the difference. Good luck.

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