I Am at the point of no return!

Maria - posted on 01/05/2014 ( 3 moms have responded )

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My children are, 18-17-16! I was abused by my 18 yr old since he was 12! Police never did anything,untill now but because he hit his youngest brother. I have placed the oldest on probation, he got away with his dirt, I called dcf , he got away with his dirt.Recently he ended up bullying my 16 yr old, and ended up hitting him, I had to get in it to defend my 16 yr old. Finally after so many yrs of I seeking help, he is now in jail. Now my 7 yr old daughter is the controlling one. Mouthy one. I have been a single parent , also taking care of my mother who has alzheimers, and a brother with mental retardation, and yes dealing with all this too with the kids. Finally..my happiness is about to come. I have not had a job, since my 18 yr old was 12, Who can work going thru what I had to go thru? Tell me who? I was so stressed and so depressed I didnt care about anything. My kids done what they wanted to . Ofcourse dcf and the police never stood up when I called,many times I wanted to give everything up and leave. I didnt because My kids were minors. Now I have a opportunity to move out of town, to get a job. I want to leave have always wanted to relocate to a better place! Here those who never did anything to help me, (my family) (my kids grandmother also) All she do is be little me, and have summerge so much into my kids brains, getting them against me! I see this moving as a opportunity. But my daughter does not want to move, she said none of them are following me to where I am going. I tell you I taking care of my mother, is free the state no one gives me pay for it! Where I reside I have been here since child hood, my father died of cancer, I want a better living. I want a job! I want to go back to school, I do not want to be in this town any more! But they dont want to come. Their god parents and aunts say for me to go , against their will and take them cuz my daughter and son are just 17-16. But I also don't want to do that because yes it messes up their school.Then their father's family, say and offer to take over the 16-&-17 yr old.I feel like it is neglect! I have never given up on my children. I understand I will have better if I move, a job, my mom well taken care, and help with my brother and also for me mental health because I have been through a lot! But I feel is child neglect if I move, and my daughter is also belittling me, by saying things that are so hurtful! I dont know what to do.What I want to do? well their aunts are serious people who finished their education. I know they will be strict and make the kids do theirs. My daughter does not see, all I want to do is push my family forwards no to her I am neglecting her, if I choose to keep her here, but she does not want to follow and after all the abuse I endure.I refuse to stay in this town. We lived in every street here, moved from them all due to the abuse the embarrassment and humiliating my son who is 18 put me thru. Their friends and guests do not respect me. They do what they want in my home! Having my 18 yr old get a apartment since he will be 19. The judge ordered he can no longer live with us, is a open door for me to concentrate on my minor children but I see I am wrong , now is their turn to mentally and emotionally drain me as well. I am not going to sit here wait till they also abuse me! Is this child neglect if I give temporary custody to the father's family? Am I being a bad mother by doing this? Their father has been in their lives, yes, financially paying child support, we just broke up since my 16 yr old was 6 months old. I feel he should now do his part phicically too! They are his kids also! I've been diagnosed with heart problems, I am only 38 yrs old.I love my kids more than I love myself, and I don't know what to do.my kids were the ones who ask to go with other people.

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What way do you think they should be raised? Here in north america children don't abuse their parents on mass. There are rules laid down and punishments, not usually physical but it gets the job done. Have they always gotten their way? That might be why they act like this and the real world will be a rude awakening for them. It's not neglect if your children are willingly staying behind with their god parents. They still have someone to care for them and they are people you chose to do that. Take the job you need it.

Maria - posted on 01/07/2014

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Yes, my father was west indian rest in peace. is how he raised us, and i grew up fine and with respect, but today due to other parents who have killed their kids, we are not allowed to raise them the way we should, and today they beat on us,steal from us, curse us and the law does nothing untill it is too late. is why they are going to be 18 soon. my oldest is going on 19 on april. he has to get his own place. my youngest two are 17-16 they can now go with their godparents. i spoked to their teachers, and they said atleast I am not leaving them on the streets, and is best I do this. Because they do not see the mother they have and they do not apreciate me.and in the long run, when they see what they are up against someone else's home and someone else's rules they will regret. but it is too late. I did my part and sacrifices for them. They do not apreciate it. I gave them my all. and they dont see it. I also have health conditions I have to address, under all this stress I have neglected myself. I have to take care of me. now. They will be fine.I tried moving because there are better schools where I am going, and better job opportunities, I already have a job online, once I move I work within a week. In here I have nothing. And they will rather I have nothing, than something. I dont know why kids today are so unapreciative. If they grew up when we were growing up......they will not survive! Thank you sweety for answering have a blessed day!

Nianne - posted on 01/06/2014

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You know I'm from the Caribbean and you know if that was my child he would be so afraid to raise his hand to even ask a question because the amount of wip ass he would have gotten he would be an angel right now

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