I am having a serious sleeping problem with my 4yr old. She is waking up 3-10+ times a night!

Beth - posted on 08/05/2011 ( 4 moms have responded )




All she says is she misses me & loves me very much(sometimes she says she is scared & heard a noise). She has always slept on her own in her room since she was 5mos. My husband & i were seperated for about a month and that is when all this started. One night she spent the night without me, but my husband has been back home now for 2mos.She is very attached to me & seems to be having some serious anxiety about being apart from me. This problem has been going on 3mos now & i am i ready to loose my mind with all these sleepless nights! I will say everynight is different sometimes she only wakes up 3 times other nights its every hour & sometimes every 30min until i give in & let her sleep in my bed!!! I dont want her sleep in my room or bed i think it is a bad habit to start, but after i have woken up so many times sometines i just let her crawl into my bed! My husband just thinks i should let her sleep with us, but i dont agree at all for many reasons- i cant hardly sleep when she is in our bed, prek will start in a few weeks & we all need a good nights sleep!!! I have tried conseques, rewards & white noise. PLEASE HELP WE HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING ALL OUR FRIENDS/FELLOW PARENTS HAVE SUGGESTED!


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Jodi - posted on 08/08/2011




I actually think it is fairly normal behaviour around that age. My daughter used to wake a lot and get scared, didn't want to be on her own, and I really believe it is just a phase. I just followed my instincts and rather than fight it, just went with it for a while until the phase passed.

I still had an old cot mattress in storage, so I threw that on the floor beside my side of the bed with a pillow and blanket, and IF she woke during the night, she disturbed no-one, she just snuck into our room and onto her little mattress. My daughter was never a co-sleeper either, but suddenly just needed me to be near her. I just figured that going with it rather than fighting it, everyone got their sleep, including her. It probably lasted about 12 months, although towards the end she was really only crawling in there about twice a week. So she outgrew it on her own and we were able to get rid of the mattress :).

Beth - posted on 08/08/2011




thank u jane 4 ur post! she does sleep with her baby that i won out of machine 2 years ago!!! she sleeps with it & takes everywhere with her, but i have not tried her sleeping with anything that smells like me- i will have to try that! we do read a story everynight too! thanks again...i know ths is a phase but it just seems to last 4ver!!!

Jenny - posted on 08/08/2011




I totally agree with Jane. Give her a piece of clothing that smells like you. Furthermore, I would make a routine out of going to bed. My twin girl used to get me upset because she messed up my sleep. Now I ensure that she has her teddy bear or any other toy. I hug her and kiss her and tell her I will see her in the morning. I tell her that I am so proud of her for sleeping in her own bed..etc....It takes time however,...but in the long run u do not want to create another habit...i.e. sleeping in your bed. Good luck!!
I totally feel your pain..it is like having a newborn baby all over again...

Jane - posted on 08/06/2011




she needs reassurance, thats all, a soft toy with your smell on it, a nighlight, bed time story and all the love in the world, ask daddy to be there to read the story too, as she obviously thinks hes going away again, my mum and dad put a single bed in their room for my young sister as my dad used to work away alot and she was so insecure, it onlylasted 8 months but at least mum got some rest as my sister didnt get in her bed. mum and dad had to make love in the living room, quite exciting she said xx hope this helps she knows your anxious xxxx

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