I am having issues with my daycare's potty training policy, what can I do?

Rachel - posted on 08/19/2011 ( 2 moms have responded )

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My 29 month old son is underwear potty trained at home and has been for about three weeks now. Two weeks ago I let daycare know that we have been working on it and asked for them to continue it now that he is comfortable and used to using the potty with no accidents. Initially they asked for him to be sent in pull-ups. I totally understood, knowing that maybe they were hesitant about how trained he really was. It has now been two weeks and they still request pull-ups and won't entertain the idea of training underwear. He has an accident a couple times a week at daycare, no accidents at home even when we are out and about. He is good at telling us when he has to go and we check with him every so often. I suggested that maybe he is using the pull-ups as a safety net and if he is not being reminded occasionally to use the restroom then he will go in the pull-up. I understand that there are other kids around and other distractions but I honestly believe that if the tactic was consistent between home and daycare then he would not be having accidents. Everything we have done with him has been cold turkey, bottles/pacifiers, crib to toddler bed etc. I feel his progression is now stagnant because daycare won't even try underwear. I have had a conversation with our provider and she won't budge? Any advice or suggestions? Thank you so much.

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Shelley - posted on 10/30/2013

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For a little guy of 29 months to be potty trained is awesome, most toddlers especially boys aren't completely trained (little to no accidents) until 4 years of age.
I do understand why your daycare is asking for pull-ups. Try wearing training under-ware with over pants. They're not those sweaty plastic pants. Over pants are made of a water resistant material with Velcro tabs, they fit over regular under-wear or training underwear. They do help keep fluids from getting on floors and carpets. Daycares need to follow what is called the Universal, Standard and Transmission-based Precautions. As they apply to child care settings, set-forth by the American Academy of pediatrics.
Your center knows that 98% of children aren't completely daytime independent until age 4. The center is taking precautions, they know that accidents are expected during training- it's a normal part of the learning process. Feces and urine are transmission based fluids, they need to be contained with-in the diaper or pull-up, they carry lots of infectious organisms. As does human breast milk, blood and other body fluids. When waste material is not contained, sanitation and disinfection policies must goes into affect. The method used for cleaning bodily hazards is extensive. I seriously believe your center is doing the right thing, they're keeping all children safe!

Lavern - posted on 08/19/2011

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It may be time to look for a new daycare provider who does reinforceme potty training.

I have two children (12 and 9), and when they were being potty trained, I had a daycare provider who was on board 100%. It's confusing to your son to know he has to go - and what he's being taught at home, but is in an environment that does not encourage his growth and progress.

Loyalty is one thing, care for your child's well being is another. During the interview with other providers, ask what their policy is on potty training. If it doesn't coincide with where you are in training YOUR child, move on til you find the one that does.

Remember, your child's needs are the most important in this equation.

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