I am sure this has been posted a million times..

Julie - posted on 10/31/2012 ( 5 moms have responded )

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I am new to the "circle" my 14 year old went for the summer with her father and didn't come back. They assisted her in calling CPS and lying-terrible lies about me and told CPS if she has to live with me she will hurt herself. She was caught sneaking out and skipping camp without permission, among other things and so I took all her privledges away. Her dad works at least 24hrs a time, and her step mom is sick a lot.. so there is less supervision. She came this weekend for a visit for the first time in several months. I made sure to have things planned and not focus on the emotional turmoil that she has put my family through.. I didn't question her or ask why even though it is a daily question. Her sister cried a lot (age 9) and she seemed unbelievable cold to all of us. I know the step-mom says mean things about us. I have overheard conversations with her telling my daughter to "take whatever she can get from me I will give her anything at this point" I feel so sad.. I have text her lots since she got back to her dads and I get "busy" Why does she hate me so much? dying inside

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Julie - posted on 11/01/2012

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we were in therapy before she did all this, i thought it was helping her and me.. i probably do need to continue even without her.. it is just so terrible to feel like this .. i appreciate the responses. my family keeps telling me to stop "smoothering" her make her come to me.. I just don't know if that is the right approach, I mean I am the Mom isn't it my responsiblility to be the adult not the child? I am not a game player, but I know she is using me too, but when she calls for money one day and I give it then the next few days she is ugly.

Angela - posted on 10/31/2012

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i would get some councelling yourself and deal with your emotions before tackling her emotions. u cant help another when ur wounded....



the dad and partner in crime are obviously vindictive and nasty... deal with you first xx

Ariana - posted on 10/31/2012

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You should try to get some family councelling with her. There are obviously a lot of issues going on that you and her need to work out. Even if you didn't do anything against her that most likely isn't her perspective of the situation. It's great that you decided to try to focus on being positive during your visit. A lot of people wouldn't be able to do that.



Definitely try to get some councelling sessions with her if you can work that into a schedule somehow. There's no reason that shouldn't be able to be accomidated right?

Jazmyne - posted on 10/31/2012

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:( I am so sorry mama. I hate it when parents who are seperated 'poison' the children against the other parent. I hope things get better for you.

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