I can't decide whether to go back home to have baby???

Krista - posted on 12/04/2010 ( 7 moms have responded )

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My husband and I are stationed in Georgia and my family lives in Minnesota. I would really like to go home and have my baby there so I can be with my family and friends, also I have a 9month old daughter to take care of and no one here other than my husband to help me. So while he's taking care of her i would be there by myself. and not to mention the doctor said i will most likely have a premie because i am already starting to dialate and i have been in and out of the hospital a few times so they could stop my labor. so I will more than likely be in the hospital for a few weeks. I really dont want to do that alone. my husband can't have our daughter in the hospital the whole time.

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[deleted account]

I know you consider home to be Minnesota. But if it were me, I'd rather be close to the comforts of my house in Georgia and have the baby delivered by the doc that I've seen throughout my whole pregnancy. Maybe your mom or family member can make the trip to help you out? If not, and you decide to go home, just clear it with the doc first.

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[deleted account]

Sometimes the best planning can never work out the way you want. What if you did go home to MN and there was an emergency? Sometimes you just can't predict when you will go into labor, or when baby says it's time. Could your husband be there ASAP? Probably not. And while you have your family with you, your poor husband is worrying about his wife & child en route on a several hour plane ride. I also don't agree with the idea of keeping your older child away from her Daddy, but that's JMO. Wouldn;t your husband be worried about you on a daily basis and want to see you? Hug you? Feel baby in belly move? I can understand your concern about having someone watch your older child. But that's when yo ulook for help in the local community. I know there are many military support groups for people in your situation, without no local family. Or ask your family from MN to come to you. Even if it's a week, it's still help. Or, perhaps your mom can come for one week, go home, and then your dad can come for another week. Who said your parents have to come to GA together? Are there any other relatives that can come to you? best of luck.

[deleted account]

I'd still prefer to be close to my house and husband, even if he can't help you out in the hospital. I sleep better in my own bed and like having my stuff around and my husband to talk to and his support. If you were living with your parents while your baby was in the hospital, you'd be more like a guest...sleeping in a strange bed and away from your husband during a stressful situation. However, this is only something YOU can decide. I'm just telling you what I'd do, which is not necessarily the best thing for YOU. Just take those things into consideration, and I wish you the best of luck. Sorry to hear about your son.

Krista - posted on 12/04/2010

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once i go into labor he would fly back to mn and be there. my parents can come to ga, but only for a week or so. and the dr says if hes a premie we will most likely be in there for a few weeks/months. however long it takes for him to be stable enough to go home

Theresa - posted on 12/04/2010

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Is it fair for your husband to miss the birth of his child just so you don't have to be alone in the hospital for a week or so? Is it possible for a family member to come to GA once you go into the hospital so that your husband can be there with you part of the time?

Nichole - posted on 12/04/2010

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That is a hard decision to make. But one thing to consider is, that traveling especially from Georgia to Minnesota could throw you into labor...possibly enough that they won't be able to stop it. I know when I had issues with preterm labor I was on bedrest & told NOT to get out of bed unless to go to the doctor or bathroom, and to DEFINATELY NOT travel.

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