I don't know if my husband truely loves me

Rachel - posted on 09/14/2014 ( 1 mom has responded )

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Hmmm how to start.... We'll I was pregnant at 18 I had only known my babies father for a month before we got pregnant and was married a month later. We have been married for over six years now and I feel like I don't even know who I am anymore. As soon as we were married I moved in with him and I didn't work or go to school or anything. Shortly after I left home me and my family had a falling out and so I was left alone with someone I hardly knew carrying a baby. I think I found it comforting and a place I felt wanted or needed by constantly catering to my husband. And I think he liked the control. immediately after the birth of my son I suffered from depression which led to an eating disorder which slowly spiraled downward. There has been countless times I have threatened leaving my husband and I did once for like a week then I CALLED HIM to come get me. It had been a constant roller coaster over the years and I feel sort of dead inside. I'm so scared of what to do. I keep telling myself that if I do leave what if I was just being to hard on the relationship or I had too high of expectations. My husbands family is crazy and I think what if he moves back there with them and my son grows up being around them and being subjected to them. What if I make a mistake? I'm not through school yet and I have no way of supporting me or my son. I have thought what if I just wait until I get done with school and then see how it is. But that would be just another year of the same roller coaster ride too. What should I do??!?

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Saph - posted on 09/14/2014

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You have to decide this yourself. Do you love him? Think back to when you first met him and what attracted you to him. If the relationship is unhealthy then you need to think about what is best for your child. And no matter what your husband and his family will always be in your life because of your son. If the only reason you are still with him is because of money then you should probably leave. Be honest with your husband about your needs. If you have to leave there are many programs that will help you get on your feet. You can get help with housing, food, and daycare. Many people think they can't make it on their own but they can .

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