I feel uncomfortable with this

Dereck - posted on 07/19/2016 ( 2 moms have responded )

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I have three boys ages 16, 13 and 11 . I am not a mom but a single dad. I recently got custody of my three sons since my x-wife passed away from leukemia. Not having spent much time with my boys since they lived in Oklahoma with their mom having them live with me has been difficult for me to deal with all that they do. My youngest soon constantly goes naked from the shower to his room even thought I asked him not too dozens of times. None of my boys were circumcised at birth and now my oldest son wants to have his foreskin removed because he says he don't like how it looks. I don't feel comfortable discussing this with him so I took him to see his doctor. Hoping that the doctor would talk some sense into him but the doctor told me that he has a very lengthy foreskin that extends more then two inches and should be removed. My son told me that even when he has an erection the foreskin hangs off the head more then an inch. I don't know what to do or how to discuss this with him. My fear is that the other boys will also want to be circumcised. I would appreciate any feedback. Thank you.

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~♥Little Miss - posted on 07/19/2016

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He is 16 years old, and not fully grown yet. He will be 18 in 2 years. He can decide when he is an adult. If you are considering doing this, or at least helping him get all the correct information and options, go with him to several different doctors/specialists to get an experienced medical perspective.

Lisa - posted on 07/19/2016

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These kinds of conversations can be very difficult. I know my husband would be very uncomfortable. It was the best thing to take him to the doctor. And since the Dr had that response, I would take him seriously. If your son is wanting to do this and the dr agrees that it is a good idea, can you let that happen? I have 3 sons (adults now) and I had them circumcised when they were born because of the research that I did. Maybe you can do some online research and talk to the doctor. The important thing is that the boys know that you care, and that you want the best for them. You having the uncomfortable conversation in detail is not as important as you helping them to solve their questions. I am sorry for the loss of their mom. I hope and pray you will consider this a new chapter in your life, with new experiences and new opportunities. You don't have to do things "the way she did". You can create your own memories based on your abilities and interests as well as theirs. Find out what they like and make an effort to learn something about it, no matter how small. Believe me, they will feel loved because of your interest. Take them fishing, camping. Try to make one memory a month, no matter how simple. And talk to them. It doesn't have to be about uncomfortable stuff...motorcycles, cars....boy things. Sometimes it is in the midst of those conversations that boys feel most loved. There is a great book that would really help you it is called "The Good Dad" by Jim Daly.

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