I have a 13 year old son and a 12 year old daughter. They fight like crazy and I'm scared it is going to get to far. My son is ADHD and bipolar and my daughter is just ADHD. I don't know what to do with these two.
Ariana - posted on 10/07/2012
What are they fighting about? If they are freqently fighting about the same things maybe you should sit them down and tell them they need to solve their problems respectfully.
So put them at a table, ask what the problem is and have them write down all the different solutions to the issue. So if it's, I don't know, so and so keeps playing on my console when I told them not to, have both of them write down all the ways they could solve this. It might be, DON'T, only play with it when I say, you can play on it for 20 minutes a day. You can play on it if you let me use this thing of yours, only when I've played etc. I'm not saying this is one of the issues but have them work things out with each other in a respectful manner. Don't involve yourself but tell them until they've worked it out they are basically going to have to go to their rooms.
Either they will work things out or be seperated from each other. At this age tempers flare and communication skills are still not at the best. They need to learn to work their problems out and speak respectfully with each other.
Once again if a fight starts you can ask them, can you two sort this out or are you going to need to go to your rooms to calm down for a bit? Do you need to sit at the table and write it out? If they start arguing with you or ignore you tell them it's time to go to your rooms. Once they are calm or seperated you can ask them both if they're ready to sort it out. They might decide it's to much work to have to do this every single time they fight and either avoid the argument or have to work it out.
Do NOT get involved in the argument, have them come to an agreement. If they write things out you can start them off by telling them to read their ideas out loud and no one is allowed to laugh at the other persons idea. Ask each of them if they can find a solution. If it gets heated again send them to their room to cool off.
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