Mary J - posted on 12/27/2012 ( 1 mom has responded )
I remember crying to my mother right before I went and bought the pregnancy test that I didn't want to be pregnant again. Here I was, a grown woman crying like I was sixteen and pregnant. I knew I was pregnant before I even took the test and now, everytime I think about the test, or the new baby, or my daughter who I just wanted to be my spoiled one and only, I just cry. Sobbing cry.
My wonderful, loving, ever so supporting husband 2 B keeps telling me its all going to be okay ... that he always wanted two kids. This from the man who just got done telling me a few months ago that having just our daughter is what is wants.
Plus I am so scared. My first pregnancy went horrible. I spent the trimester in the hospital when my kidneys failed and ended up with a emergency Csection after 2 days of labor. We both thanked God our daughter came out "perfect" Those were the doctors exact words. What if we arn't so lucky this time. What if I don't make it. I feel likeI have let my daughter down, taken her away from this future I planned just for her
Now its barely a year since my daughter was born and all it took was one time. I know the exact day too because I even had the fleeting thought of going and getting the morning after pill. These are the thoughts going around in my head. We can't afford another baby, we don't have room for another baby, we arn't even married yet!!!!!! So much for saving for that special day. Hello JP :( :( :(
Are there some mothers out there similar to me? Was number 2 so unexpected, it felt unwanted? I guess I need to know its going to be okay. I need to know what to do ...please help