I have a 16 year old daughter who does nothing around the house. I have told her that her daily chore is to sweep the rec room and make sure that all of her things are put away before she goes to bed each night. She is also responsible for keeping her room clean. Every single day it is a struggle. I am constantly on her and reminding her to do these simple things. I started to take away some of her privileges which included no laptop, no cable in the bedroom and just recently I got rid of her internet access in her room all together. She doesnt seem to really be affected by this at all. I told her this morning that until I saw an improvement in her responsibilities here at home, she would no longer be allowed to go over to any of her friends homes. She shrugged her shoulders and said that it was ok. How am I supposed to handle this? Nothing fazes her in the least. I need some advice please?!?!
Cassie - posted on 12/11/2012
Funny thing is is that I have tried that approach. I just got done talking with her again about this on the way home from school. I told her what she was going to start doing to help our the family and until that became her regular routine and she showed some responsibility, she would not be socializing with anyone and having "fun" because her friends are. She said "OK" and then asked if she could use the phone to call her friend and let her know that she wouldnt be allowed to do anything for a while because she had to change things at home. Then she handed me back the phone and said thank you. She is now in her room supposedly doing her homework. Didnt faze her in the least that she had to cancel her plans.
Carrie - posted on 12/11/2012
I would try being completely straight with her. Tell her that she can either save you both the frustration of struggling to find a solution to the problem and continue acting childish or work with you on a solution as a young adult. That kind of tug of war usually gets you nowhere. I raised 2 girls. I feel your frustration! I wish someone had told me to be straight with mine. It could have saved me many battles. Good luck!
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