I have a stupid question!!

Erinn - posted on 05/27/2009 ( 214 moms have responded )

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I have 2 kids... Noah is 3 and Ava is almost 7 months old. We only have 2 rooms in our duplex and right now Noah has his own room and Ava is in my husband and my room. I know eventually i'll have to move Ava into Noah's room... Right now Noah is still in his crib... he hasn't learned how to climb out yet and I know once we move him to a "big boy" bed he'll be getting out ALL THE TIME!! But we only have one crib... (Ava is sleeping in her swing right now... it's working well for the moment). I heard somewhere that you should only put children in the same room if they're the same sex!! I've never really understood why, but I have a BOY and a GIRL... has anyone else heard about that or have any advice??

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Samantha - posted on 05/27/2009

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Depending on the state that you live in it maybe illegal for two children of the opposite sex to share a bedroom, here in PA there are places where apartments will not rent you a 2 bedroom if you have two children of opposite sexes due to the laws.

Louise - posted on 06/04/2009

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My son and daughter share a bedroom at the moment (aged 2 & 1) and i dont think its a problem. according to our local govenment different sex children can share a room until the age of 8 when they must be moved into seperate rooms.

Amy - posted on 06/03/2009

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I have a 12 year old son, and a 9 year old daughter. Obviously now they have their own bedrooms, but back at those ages I think it's fine to have them in one room in seperate beds, It lets them have company at night....But once your oldest hits Kindergarten, you may want to make the changes then....Good Luck and enjoy those babies!!!!

[deleted account]

your daughter should stay in ur room til she is one. when it's time to moce her get a gard rail on your sons bed also get some safty looks for your refridge and cabinets thy work also get an alarm for your sons bedroom door so when he gets up you will hear the alarm go off when he opens the bedroom door. hope this helps. good luck

Jessica - posted on 06/02/2009

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you should not be putting a baby in a swing to sleep overnight.

Its bad for their back their head and what are you going to do when she won't sleep in her crib when there is no motion?

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214 Comments

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Christy - posted on 05/22/2011

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My first two kids are a girl and a boy. We add them share bedrooms for years. If circumstances don't change, then you just need to work hard to teach them privacy as they get older.

As for the crib, it's time to move Noah out of the crib and put the baby in the crib. At his age, he will probably adjust very easily to a toddler bed or even a twin size bed.

Mel - posted on 06/06/2009

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I dont think there is anything wrong with children sharing a room at a young age whether they are the same sex or not. just teach them to respect eachothers privacy and their belongings and they will be the best friends. my brother and i shared a room until i was 6 or 7 and we are best pals. i'm now 20 and he is 18. i dont see a problem with it!

Holly - posted on 06/05/2009

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I think it is Ok to put Brother and Sister in the same room until they are around 7 or 8 years old then they need there own rooms.



When you put Noah in a big boy bed put a gate on the room door on the outside so you can still close the door and he can still open the door if he needs you. It will help keep him in his room and you will be able to get to him before he gets out and into something. Also make it a special for Noah that he is in a big boy bed then ask him if it is Ok if Ava can have the crib now.



After a couple week then you can put Ava in the room in the crib.



I hope this helps.

Telle - posted on 06/04/2009

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I have heard of that. I was under the impression it was once they reached a certain age they had to be seperated. I have twins boy and girl 1 yr. old and right now they share a room together.

Jade - posted on 06/04/2009

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You can put them int the same room until they reach a certain age... it's like 10 i believe... when they are that little they wouldn't know the difference... the only thing i would worry about would be your son trying to climb into the crib... because that transition from the safety of the crib to a "big boy bed" might be a bit scary so he might try to climb in there for security... I hope this helps...

Stacy - posted on 06/04/2009

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so my aunt and uncle have 5 children 2 to youngest share a room and think nothing of it people just are weird these day boys and girls have been sharrin rooms what if u had five kids in a 2 bedroom house

User - posted on 06/04/2009

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my brother has 3 kids 1 girl age 4 and 2 boys age 5 and 3 and they live in a 2 bed house and the conceil wont move them till the 5 year old is 9 they say they can share a room till then

User - posted on 06/04/2009

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my brother has 3 kids 1 girl age 4 and 2 boys age 5 and 3 and they live in a 2 bed house and the conceil wont move them till the 5 year old is 9 they say they can share a room till then

User - posted on 06/04/2009

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my brother has 3 kids 1 girl age 4 and 2 boys age 5 and 3 and they live in a 2 bed house and the conceil wont move them till the 5 year old is 9 they say they can share a room till then

User - posted on 06/04/2009

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my brother has 3 kids 1 girl age 4 and 2 boys age 5 and 3 and they live in a 2 bed house and the conceil wont move them till the 5 year old is 9 they say they can share a room till then

Paulina - posted on 06/04/2009

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It really depends on the state and the age of the children. It's really to bad that the parents don't have more say in their own kids upbringing.

Rosy - posted on 06/04/2009

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My sister died from SIDS ( sudden infant death syndrome) because she was bent in a chair for 9 months at night she bend her back in such a way that it trapped her nerve and reflexes that controls muscles for sick and coughs to occur

Lynne - posted on 06/04/2009

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They are still young enough that you can put them in the same room. By the time they are school aged, you may not be living in the same place. I don't see anything wrong with you putting them in the same room. Your daughter is eventually going to get to bid for her swing and your son will eventually learn how to climb out of his crib, besides you and your husband need your space too.

Shanna - posted on 06/04/2009

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i think it is ok when they are younger. but when you putting him in a big boy bed doesn't mean you can let him get out. put a gate up at the door or put the door safety thing on. talk about not getting out of bed. give stickers if he needs too.i would put him in a big boy bed for a little bit before putting your youngest in the crib in his room. so he doesn't feel like he is getting kicked out of it. if i had to i would put my kids in the same room for a little bit. maybe if your room is big enough you could put up a devider??? if possible?

[deleted account]

I shared a room with my brother for years...I dont think I'm too damaged by it. We got our own rooms around puberty for privacy, but I really enjoyed hsi company when I was little.

[deleted account]

I shared a room with my brother for years...I dont think I'm too damaged by it. We got our own rooms around puberty for privacy, but I really enjoyed hsi company when I was little.

Misty - posted on 06/04/2009

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I think that it doesn't matter the sex of the children until they are older - mine shared a room until they were 7 (boy) and 5 (girl), and then they got their own rooms because the house we moved into was big enough. There is nothing wrong with young children of the opposite sex sharing a room.

[deleted account]

I shared a bedroom with my younger brother until i was 7- We both had mattress on the floor...then we got bunks?

Frances - posted on 06/03/2009

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I don't think that you should really worry when they are so young. As they get older they may want a little bit of privacy (I think that is what it really is all about, not anything else) and they will want their own space. I have seen several ways that people do this without putting kids into two rooms, you can divide the room with shelving down the middle for privacy or a curtain that can be let down or opened.



BTW get that baby a crib and your son a bed soon though, I think that they would sleep better.



My sons shared a bed till they were 5 and they had two beds, kids love to be together. The hardest part was to get them to stop cutting up and get to sleep.



I have 3 girls and 2 boys and really don't have this problem, but I don't think that it is a real issue to put them in the same room at that age.

Michelle - posted on 06/03/2009

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I know foster homes can't share rooms like that but they are your own children and they are young. They will most likely find it fun. Good luck

Nadia - posted on 06/03/2009

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Honey Please!! LOL! You better do what you have to do and put them kids in the same room if needed. And get that toddler a bed and put that baby in that crib so she can be comfortable. He will feel like a big boy watching his baby sis.

Nichol - posted on 06/03/2009

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i never heard that, besides they are young who cares. I have a 2 yr old, boy and 7 week girl, 2 bedroom and they share a room. I have no problem, it actually helps with my son thinking he's job is "to watch his sister" which stops him from coming into our room at night

Jennifer - posted on 06/03/2009

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i have heard the thing about opposite sexes sharing a room being illegal, but i'm not sure what states. i would look into it, because i do believe that there may be grants and such available to remedy such an issue. i have to agree that its a stupid law up until a certain age, but i think it may have been put into place for those who abuse the foster care system and use it for a paycheck, rather than to help change anothers life. i know here in NY the won't allow it in custody battles (its how my husband got his kids in the divorce, too bad she moved and took him back to court... but thats another story)

Maryann - posted on 06/03/2009

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I have two girls and they still pretty much sleep together on their double bunks.I don't think it's a problem putting your two little ones together in the same room...I mean they are brother and sister right? so I don't see anything wrong about that.

Amanda - posted on 06/03/2009

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ok Its time for the preschooler to get out of the baby bed and into a big boy bed and pass the crib onto his sissy! She is sleeping in her swing! I cant imagine it would be a very quality sleep. She is a child and she needs a bed. there is no reason why they cant share a room or maybe you can get a bigger place? if you cant afford a bigger place maybe you can check into some social housing programs for low income families.

Tina - posted on 06/03/2009

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rubbish. i have never heard of not putting a boy and a girl in the same room at such a young age. when i lived in a 2 bedroom flat i had 2 boys and a girl in the same room, and it was only when i was pregant with my 4th child and got my house that my daughter went into her own room. really your son at 3 should be in a big boy bed already. and if he gets out of bed then put him back in until he learns, but dont talk to him. ever if you sit on top of the stairs and read a book, it sounds tiring but in the end it works and your daughter then could go into the crib, you and your husband needs your room back to yourselves again. good luck

Monique - posted on 06/03/2009

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Quoting Erinn:

I have a stupid question!!

I have 2 kids... Noah is 3 and Ava is almost 7 months old. We only have 2 rooms in our duplex and right now Noah has his own room and Ava is in my husband and my room. I know eventually i'll have to move Ava into Noah's room... Right now Noah is still in his crib... he hasn't learned how to climb out yet and I know once we move him to a "big boy" bed he'll be getting out ALL THE TIME!! But we only have one crib... (Ava is sleeping in her swing right now... it's working well for the moment). I heard somewhere that you should only put children in the same room if they're the same sex!! I've never really understood why, but I have a BOY and a GIRL... has anyone else heard about that or have any advice??



Hi there an answer to your question,I live in Adelaide,South Australiaand I know that it is law that  any2 children of opposite  sex cannot share a room after any of the children turn 8ys of age.I am not sure what the age or law states anywhere  else hope this helps you out.If not just google the question I do quite often.cheers Monique

Jill - posted on 06/03/2009

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Shortly after I was born, my parents had to move because they were living in a 2 bedroom apartment and it was illegal for siblings of the opposite sex to share a room. However, I feel that at that age, it's silly. I can understand when they are older, and feel that when they're older they shouldn't share a room. But I did read where you said you don't think even when they're older you'll be able to move...and really, just do the best you can with what you have...if you can't get them in their own rooms, it won't be the end of the world, just teach them to respect each others privacy. But I would definately get your son into a toddler bed and your daughter into a crib. Put her in your room in the crib for a little while til your son is used to his new bed, then move her in! Good luck!

Yalitza - posted on 06/03/2009

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Hi Errin,

I currently have a 3 and a half year old girl and a 2 year old boy. My bedroom is on the second floor and I have another room upstairs as well. I have the two of them share a room, because I feel they are too small to sleep downstairs by themselves. I don't have a problem with it. They each have thier own beds and everything else they need. They enjoy being with each other. I don't think it's a bad thing as long as you teach them to respect each other. Also, when they get older you can then decide what your next move will be.

Yalitza - posted on 06/03/2009

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Hi Errin,

I currently have a 3 and a half year old girl and a 2 year old boy. My bedroom is on the second floor and I have another room upstairs as well. I have the two of them share a room, because I feel they are too small to sleep downstairs by themselves. I don't have a problem with it. They each have thier own beds and everything else they need. They enjoy being with each other. I don't think it's a bad thing as long as you teach them to respect each other. Also, when they get older you can then decide what your next move will be.

Jennifer - posted on 06/03/2009

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At their ages it sounds perfectly fine to me. You really have to go with what works for your family. Many kids do better when they share a room. They provided comfort and support. It maybe a great bonding experience. As far as the bed goes, let Noah find the bed he likes best and make a big deal about it. Make sure he knows the rules about getting out and be consistent with what ever rules you have made. Change is never easy at first for kids but they will get it after a time.

Beth - posted on 06/03/2009

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I babysit for a family that has 2 boys (10 and 5) and 2 girls (8 and 3) and all 4 are in the same room. They seem to be doing just fine! I also stayed with my brother in the same room. I'm not sure when we moved but I know I was at least 3 (He would have been 6)

Tammy - posted on 06/03/2009

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After my divorce I moved into a 2 bedroom apartment, my son and daughter shared a room. they didnt change clothes in front of each other or sleep in the same bed. . .i dont think its an issue

Tammy - posted on 06/03/2009

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After my divorce I moved into a 2 bedroom apartment, my son and daughter shared a room. they didnt change clothes in front of each other or sleep in the same bed. . .i dont think its an issue

Rita - posted on 06/03/2009

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My suggestion to your worry about Noah getting out of his big boy bed, is to get him settled into a bedtime routine in a big boy bed before you put Ava into his room. If you follow the "Supernanny bedtime routine", he'll be staying in bed in no time. (the biggest thing I find with my 3.5 yr old is, when he gets up I DON"T engage in conversation with him) Check out Supernanny.com for her routine.(she always has good ideas that WORK)

Kelly - posted on 06/03/2009

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I have three kids..2 boys and one girl. Our daughter and middle son shared a room for about 3 years they were fine. When we moved our son and daughter were able to get their own rooms. Now we moved again (due to flood) and our sons share one room and daughter has her own....Funny thing is they still sleep together. We have lived in this house for almost a year and the boys have slept in their own beds probably 10 times if that! Most nights they sleep on her floor... And if she is sleeping over at a friends they still sleep in her room! They prefer to be together than apart...Sure she yells at them to stay outta her room but she admits it feels weird when she wakes up and one of them are not there. She has come downstairs at 3 am looking for one if she finds them sleeping on the couch or our room she wakes them up and walks them back to her room. What a mother hen :) All in all you have enough on ur plate dont sweat this. I agree you need to get the baby outta the swing though. Also my niece and nephew still share a room she is 13 and he is 7. They have a divider dividing their room which was put up less than a yr ago and its a tiny rm like 9 ft wide by 13 ft long but like many they make due with what they have for them to move would be an extra 200-400 a month!@! Not reasonable at all.. Try to keep ur head up and dont stress the little stuff... :)

Sarah - posted on 06/03/2009

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I have heard that however, I am pretty sure it is mainly for the older children at the ages of 2 and 7mths I don't believe it matters. So for now I would say go for it and then as they get older maybe try figuring something else out

Amy - posted on 06/03/2009

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I have a 12 year old son, and a 9 year old daughter. Obviously now they have their own bedrooms, but back at those ages I think it's fine to have them in one room in seperate beds, It lets them have company at night....But once your oldest hits Kindergarten, you may want to make the changes then....Good Luck and enjoy those babies!!!!

Crystal - posted on 06/03/2009

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I think it's fine while they are young. I think the concern comes into play when they are alot older, school aged, when the curiosity starts to come into play more and more. I don't think sharing the room is the problem, I think it's more teaching them that they are different and not exposing them to possible situations that may arouse their curiosity such as bathing them together. But for now, sharing a room shouldn't be a problem, especailly if they are sleeping in seperate beds. Maybe look into getting them their own rooms within the next few years.

Kat - posted on 06/03/2009

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I'd say don't sweat it! Until they get close to puberty, there's really no reason for your kids not to share a room. There are laws regarding same-sex rooming for foster kids, etc., but not for biological families.



As for the crib issue... I'd recommend moving Noah into a regular bed soon - even if it's just a mattress on the floor - since three is kind of old to still be in a crib. Also, Ava would be better off in a crib than a swing, since it allows for better muscle development and mental exploration.



What matters most, though, is your gut. Momma really does know best!

Kayleigh - posted on 06/03/2009

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apparently the law is that a boy and a girl can stay in the same room til they are 10 !!!!

Mel - posted on 06/03/2009

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Quoting louise:

they can be in the same room until the youngest is 5.its 2 do with them "experimenting" u will never no whats goin on when they ear in the room 2gether.one of my friends had her daughter stayin at her aunties n her cuz done rude things to her.her was 6 at the time n the girl was 2.i never understood it till then


 



i can see what you are talking about here, no one knows this not even my fiance and my bro was too young to remember but me , my brother and my step sister shared a room for years i was about 5-8 or maybe younger not sure my step sister was 12 she used to "experiement " with us. i dont remember alot and the memories get very faige now that i am 20 but i guess i can understand these laws because kids dont know any better and its best to avoid it. back then i didnt give a shit but now its kind of disturbing lol

Louise - posted on 06/03/2009

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they can be in the same room until the youngest is 5.its 2 do with them "experimenting" u will never no whats goin on when they ear in the room 2gether.one of my friends had her daughter stayin at her aunties n her cuz done rude things to her.her was 6 at the time n the girl was 2.i never understood it till then

Crystal - posted on 06/03/2009

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Hello Erinn! I ran across your question and thought that I would give you my opinion. I think that it would be ok for them to share a room for now. Experiment and see how it works out. I would think at about the time that Noah turns 4 or 5 you might want to figure out something different. Right now I can't see where the big problem would be. The main time that they would be together without supervision would be during the night when they are sleeping anyway.



I have a 3 year old little girl and a 1 year old little boy. We only have 1 baby bed as well. It's one of those that convert into a toddler bed. We changed it back to a baby bed after my son grew out of the bassinet. Right now the baby bed is still in my little girls room. My son sleeps in it at night and during his naps during the day. But, my little girl sleeps in the bed with my husband and I until we figure something else out. I don't think it would be a problem if mine shared a room right now, if it was big enough. But, I know that I personally would have them separated by the time my oldest is 4. Kids always get curious at some point. Hope this helps. Let me know how things work out for you. Hope you have a blessed week! : )

Andrea - posted on 06/02/2009

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Divide the room in half. Arrange the dressers, and other furniture down the middle to make a wall and possibly hang a curtian or sheet from a clothesline rope for more privacy once the kids get older. As parents we make do with what we have. Hope this helps.

Miranda - posted on 06/02/2009

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I wouldnt be to concerned about them sharing a room until they are both at the age where they notice the difference between each other.

Jennifer - posted on 06/02/2009

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I see no prob. with it while they are little...but as they get older, I feel it is inappropriate. This should be able to work for 6 more years or so.....

Melanie - posted on 06/02/2009

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acording to california law, children 5 and up are not supposed to sleep in the same room. i would have to say that 3 is a good age to graduate from the crib... he probably already knows how to climb out of it anyways. if he is made to understand bedtime is bedtime then getting out of bed wont be an issue until its time for him to get up.

Samantha - posted on 06/02/2009

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It's ok for opposite gender kids to stay together in the same room. I asked CPS this question once... and I believe they stated that when the begin to start 1st grade... that's when it becomes inappropriate. This I think is due to the sexual curiosity that arises around the age of 6 or 7. =-) Good luck to you.... I have 2 boys, 2 girls...one on the way, and only 3 bedroom house...lol

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