I have been reading the posts on kids & boyfriends

Tiffany - posted on 01/06/2015 ( 1 mom has responded )

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I have a similar problem with my children and boyfriend, they can not get along at all. At various times each side has made attempts to get along without success. We have tried to live together and it was a disaster. My bf and the kids faught like crazy and we moved back out. I have continued to see him but only when the kids are with their dad. He showed up 1 night at 12:30 am and the kids were home and a huge fight broke out with him and the kids and the kids called their dad to come get them from my house and the oldest 2 have not come back to live with me yet, they are 19 & 16, my youngest is 11 and has continued to spend time with me. This has been a long 4 1/2 yrs and I see his good qualities too but I am always feeling like I am defending my children with him. I am very upset that he won't be more mature and over look some of their behavior at times.

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♫ Shawnn ♪♫♫ - posted on 01/06/2015

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Your oldest two are more than over the age of choice. Your oldest is an adult, in fact, and can live wherever they want. If they feel that your BF isn't meeting your (or their) needs, they don't have to get along with him, nor do they have to choose to be in the same household.

I'd be looking into the root of the problem. If they have "made attempts", what happened to derail those attempts?

If it is behavioural, perhaps you need to look into those behaviours that you want him to dismiss? Does he, perhaps, have a point about problematic behaviour? Its worth looking at, anyway, if you want an amiable relationship between your children and your choice of partner.

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